


Eventide Intrigue

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Louis, Established Relationship, Feminization, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Insecure Louis, Insecure during sex, Louis in Lace, Louis in Panties, Louis likes nail polish, Louis wearing makeup, Louis-centric, M/M, Nail Polish, Nervous Louis, Reality, Rimming, Shower Sex, Supportive Harry, Top Harry, non-au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-19
Updated: 2014-07-11
Packaged: 2018-01-19 22:51:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 40,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1487077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Perrie casually asks to paint Louis' nails one night when she, Louis, Harry, and Zayn are all hanging out together. Louis is unsure about but finds himself going along with it.</p><p>Louis soon realizes he really loves the way the nail polish looks on him. It makes him feel pretty and delicate. He can't stop running his thumbs over the smooth glossy surface of his nails. </p><p>But these feeling don't come without a flood of insecurity and anxiety. Harry of course is as supportive as ever, but Louis soon finds himself needing more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

Simple nights with just his close friends were what Louis lived for nowadays. Everything had become so big and so over-the-top that the effortless nights of hanging out: no cameras, no fans, no pressure, were a rare dream come true. Louis and Harry were hanging out at Zayn and Perrie’s flat in London, doing absolutely nothing, and that was the way they liked it.

Zayn, Harry, and Louis were taking turns playing FIFA while Perrie sat in an armchair next to the couch painting her nails. Her polishes were spread out across the coffee table and she was currently carefully painting her nails using an alternation of two different colors.

“Bloody hell,” Louis shouted as he lost the last point to Zayn. Zayn shouted with joy and accidentally kicked the coffee table in his celebration.

“Oy, boys, open nail polish here!” Perrie scolded over the noise of the boy’s yelping.

“Sorry, baby,” Zayn apologized, a smile still on his face. “That means you’re out, Louis,” he clarified to Louis.

“I know, I know,” Louis griped as he passed the controller to Harry.

“You did good, babe,” Harry praised Louis as he took the controller and settled down for his match with Zayn. Zayn was in the middle of the couch, Harry and Louis on opposite ends, Louis on the end closer to Perrie and her array of polishes.

“Zaaaayn,” Perrie whined, “You’ve been playing for ages. Let me paint your nails,” she said, reaching out for Zayn’s hands across the table.

“What? Fuck, no!” Zayn protested as he clicked his controller through the menu to begin another game.

“Come on, baby, it’ll be fun! I’m an expert!” Perrie continued. She wasn’t going to give up easily.

“Nah, I’m not into it,” Zayn clarified casually as he started up another game.

“But I’m bored! I’ve already finished my own nails!” Perrie protested as she plopped herself back into her seat with a huff.

“Paint Louis’ nails, he’s not playing right now,” Zayn remarked offhandedly.

“What!?” Louis said, surprised and taken aback.

“Ooh yeah, Louis, let me paint your nails!” Perrie said, perking up excitedly.

“No way!” Louis barked, possibly a little too aggressively.

“Oh, come on, Louis, it’ll be fun!” Perrie begged.

“No, no, no, definitely not!” Louis said again. There was no way he could have Perrie paint his nails. Just the thought made him uncomfortable, although he couldn’t pinpoint why.

“Why not? You can choose whatever color you want. And you have such pretty fingernails, Lou,” Perrie said, trying any tactic she could think of. Her comment made Louis take pause. He looked down at his nails.

“I have nice nails?” he asked as he observed them.

“Yeah, you do!” Perrie confirmed, deciding to latch onto this tactic since Louis seemed to respond positively to it. “They’re perfect, you have great hands too. Polish would look so good on you! And I could take it off right away if you hate it!” Perrie continued as she arranged her polishes.

Louis continued to observe his fingers. He glanced at Harry out of the corner of his eye. Harry glanced back. Of course he had noticed the conversation, even deep into a game of FIFA. He gave Louis a delicate but reassuring smile. Louis looked away, his face reddening. He loved Harry with every ounce of his soul; he loved that Harry was not directly entering into the conversation but just giving Louis subtle encouragement with a simple glance. He had been paying attention.

“I don’t know…” Louis said, still wavering on the idea.

“Oh, come on!” Perrie whined. “Come on, Lou, don’t be a baby. Just let me do it!” Louis attempted to laugh but it just ended up sounding like a strangled cackle. He looked at his fingernails again. Perrie seemed to take this as an opening.

“Let me go get the rest of my polishes and then you can decide. I have some great colors that I just didn’t bring down!” Perrie said as she jumped up. She wasn’t taking no for an answer.

Louis shifted in his seat on the sofa. Zayn didn’t seem to be paying much attention to the conversation, although he had of course noticed the turn of events.

Harry and Zayn continued their game as Louis sat on the couch, his legs curled under him, suddenly hyperaware of himself. He wasn’t sure why the idea of having his nails painted made him uncomfortable. It wasn’t like Perrie was suggesting he was girly or anything. She had even offered Zayn first, only turning to Louis once Zayn suggested it offhand to get her off his own back so he could play his game in peace.

Perrie returned moments later with a zip-up makeup case that looked full to bursting. “These are all the colors I have,” she announced as she dumped the case’s contents onto the table and began arranging the little glass bottles. Louis watched her organize the polishes by color. She separated a few as she arranged them, pushing them off to the side closer to Louis.

“This is everything, but these are the colors I think would look best on you,” Perrie explained as she gestured to four bottles she had separated from the rest.

Louis wasn’t sure what was happening. He hadn’t even agreed to anything yet. Louis didn’t make a move. He felt anxiety tightening his chest and began to chew on his lip.

“Let me see your nails,” Perrie asked as she reached out and grabbed Louis’ left hand. She observed his fingernails, running her own fingers across the edges. “Your nails are perfect, darling. I won’t even need to file them!” she praised.

Louis swallowed hard as he glanced again at Harry. He was still watching the scene out the corner of his eye. Louis knew Harry saw exactly what was going on, but had specifically chosen to not speak his opinion. Harry again gave Louis a supportive glance. Louis adored the way Harry could say so much with just his eyes.

Louis let his gaze wander down to the nail polished Perrie had selected for him as possibilities. There was a black and a shade of brown, as well as a dark pink and a dark blue. Louis was immediately drawn to the blue. He reached out and casually picked up the little bottle.

He brought it close to his face, observing the color better. It was a nice color, really. It was deep, shadowy blue with a very slight shimmer to it. It looked good against his skin. He turned the bottle over in his hands and ran his thumb across the etching in the glass. It wasn’t a girly color. Louis looked at his nails again. They did look nice and they were a good length right now.

Louis flipped the bottle over. There was a small label on the bottom. He squinted at the small lettering.

“Eventide intrigue” it read. Louis smiled at the name. It was lovely.

“You like that one?” Perrie asked, clearly getting impatient. Louis began chewing on his lip again. Why did this have to be such a big deal? It was nail polish for god’s sake. He could just ask her to take it off if he hated it.

Before Louis knew it, Perrie was grabbing the bottle from his hand and proceeding to shake it aggressively. A little clicking noise could be heard as she shook it.

 _Eventide Intrigue_. Louis pondered these words. What did ‘eventide’ even mean? He thought it maybe meant something like ‘dusk’ or ‘twilight.’ That would make sense, it being a dark blue color. Intrigue.

Suddenly Perrie was arranging Louis’ hands palm-down on the coffee table with a paper towel underneath. Louis scooched his body forward to the edge of the couch. Apparently he had agreed to this.

Perrie unscrewed the bottle and situated herself in front of Louis on the other side of the table. She lifted the white lid off the glass bottom. Louis watched her gently scrape the excess polish off the little brush against the bottle’s rim. He took a deep breath and tried to relax his shoulders.

The polish was cool on Louis’ fingernail. He could feel its coolness seeping through to his fingertip. She had started on his right pinky finger. When she moved to his ring finger, Louis made to move his pinky so he could see it better but Perrie made a disgruntled noise.

“Ah! No moving yet!” she demanded. Louis let out a little huff of annoyance but willed himself to stay still. He wanted it to come out perfect.

Perrie worked her way quickly through ten fingers and then moved back to the first pinky again. “It’ll need two coats,” she clarified.

Louis was having trouble sitting still. He squirmed his feet instead, wiggling his toes and tapping his heels up and down.

He looked to Harry again. Harry looked back with a simple smile and then turned back to the game.

“Finished!” Perrie announced suddenly as she pulled back and admired her work. Louis was surprised. It was so quick. He gazed at his hands. It looked… interesting. He brought one hand close to his face. Perrie had done a great job. She hadn’t let the color bleed onto the skin at all. Each nail was done with meticulous perfection.

“Wow,” Louis said simply, still staring at his fingernails. They looked… good. The color was perfect. He liked it a lot.

“You like?” Perrie asked as she screwed the cap back onto the bottle and began to put all the polishes back in her case. Louis wasn’t sure if he should say yes. The truth was he did like it. He kind of loved it actually. He couldn’t stop staring.

“Can I see?” Harry asked from the other end of the couch. He paused the game and leaned behind Zayn to take a look. Zayn also turned to look, the game no longer a distraction.

Louis blushed with the sudden attention on him. Normally he loved attention, but he wasn’t sure about this. He was too embarrassed to admit he liked it, but he didn’t want to disappoint Perrie either.

“Yeah it’s… nice… I guess,” he stammered. Harry took one of his hands and was observing the polish.

“It looks great!” Harry said brightly. Louis didn’t know why but that made him blush even more. Harry could tell Louis was feeling coy so he didn’t want to go too far with the praise, but he offered one more complement. “Really, it looks perfect, Lou. You did a good job, Perrie.”

“Why thank you, Harry. I’m glad someone thinks so!” Perrie teased. Zayn was just smiling in his usual knowing manner.

“N-no, I like it,” Louis tried to clarify as he pulled his hand back.

“Well anyway, it’ll take a few minutes to dry. I’ll give you some nail polish remover to take home with you,” she said as she cleaned up her workspace. Louis nodded. He sat back on the sofa, leaning on the arm of it somewhat awkwardly. He held his hands out, fingers splayed. He didn’t want to mess up the polish before it even dried.

Louis couldn’t take his eyes off his fingers. The polish was beginning to harden. It was shiny and smooth. Louis wanted to stroke his fingertip over the smoothness of it, but knew he couldn’t until it was fully dry. He kept flipping his hands over, admiring at his nails from the back, his fingers splayed, and then turning his hands around and curling his fingers so he could observe them against his palm.

Eventide intrigue. The name was just right. It was dark and mysterious, as wonderful as the nail polish itself, painted smoothly and delicately across Louis’ fingernails. Louis found himself grinning. Harry had said it was perfect. It was perfect. It was just lovely, Louis thought to himself. And it looked lovely on him.

Zayn groaned and stretched, stealing Louis’ attention. “I think I’ll call it a night,” he moaned, throwing the game controller onto the floor.

“Yeah, we should probably be heading home,” Harry agreed. Perrie had disappeared to find Louis some nail polish remover. The three boys stood up off the couch. Perrie returned moments later.

“Sorry, darling, I couldn’t find anything,” Perrie announced as she reentered the room, her face looking confused. “I swear I had a tiny bit left, but I guess I used it up a few days ago. I was going to give you the almost empty bottle, it would’ve been just enough for one last use. But I can’t find it. Perhaps I just chucked it?” Perrie explained.

“Oh…” Louis said, unsure of what that meant. Would he have to buy it himself now?

“Sorry, babe,” Perrie apologized again, “But it’s super easy to find at any pharmacy.”

“Yeah, okay,” Louis said softly, looking down at his fingers again. Thank god he didn’t have anything planned for the next day. Zayn and Harry were already making their way out of the room. Louis followed them, Perrie behind Louis.

“It looks good on you, Lou. You should keep it!” Zayn joked as he followed Harry to the front door. Louis felt his cheeks reddening again.

They all said their goodbyes. Perrie and Zayn made their way upstairs as Harry and Louis walked out into the chilly evening. The air was damp and cool and the moon was shining brightly, casting a lovely glow on everything. Louis breathed in the crispness of the night. Eventide, he thought to himself. What a lovely word to express the beauty of the nighttime. He glanced at his nails again but couldn’t see them in the dim light.

On the drive home Louis sat in the passenger seat, one leg curled under himself, gazing out the window. He was feeling quiet, lost in his thoughts. He couldn’t stop running his thumb over the other fingernails. He loved how they felt with the hardened polish, smooth and silky.

“Do you like it?” Harry asked after a while. Louis knew what he was referring to.

“I guess,” he said softly, not wanting to fully admit even to Harry how much he actually loved it. Harry let the subject lie. He could tell Louis was in his head right now, and let him stay there.

 

Louis washed his face that night with incredible care. He hadn’t even wanted to get his fingers wet, but quickly discovered that the water didn’t affect the polish. It had dried up nicely, leaving a glossy hard coating that Louis couldn’t stop running his thumbs over.

He was so careful with his fingers with every move he made. And every time he accidentally bumped a fingernail into something he quickly turned his hand to make sure he hadn’t spoiled the perfect polish. But he had been good so far. He smiled at himself, his nails still looked exceptional, not a scratch.

Louis flitted happily into his and Harry’s bedroom, a smile on his face. He very delicately pulled off his shirt, leaving himself in only boxers; he had ever-so-carefully taken off his pants earlier, praying his nails wouldn’t scrape on the zipper.

Harry turned from his phone when he sensed Louis’ joyful body language. Louis was climbing into bed, carefully, and grasping the sheets with his fingers splayed so as to not rub his nails against the bedding. Harry chuckled softly to himself. He was sure he had the cutest boyfriend to ever exist.

“I love you, babe,” Harry said softly as he turned his body to face Louis. Louis smiled and licked his lips.

“I love you, too,” he said, turning to gaze at Harry.

“Come here,” Harry invited as he opened his arms. Louis immediately moved his body into Harry’s embrace, pressing themselves together and tangling their legs, Harry’s big body and arms engulfing Louis. They laid their bodies down, still embracing each other, Louis’ face pressed to Harry’s chest.

They lie like that for several minutes, their breathing become slow and synchronized. Eventually Louis slowly moved one hand up and began to gaze again at his blue fingernails. It was a wonderful color. He couldn’t stop staring.

Harry watched Louis. He couldn’t help but smile. “It looks good,” Harry said softly against the top of Louis’ head. Louis felt his face heat up. He didn’t know why the praise made him feel that way.

“Yeah?” he asked shyly. He let his hand rest on Harry’s hip. The blue even looked perfect against Harry’s pale skin.

“Yeah, it’s perfect, Lou. It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful,” Harry praised. Louis felt himself melt at these words. His breath caught in his throat. He felt suddenly overwhelmed. “Really, Louis,” Harry continued, shifting down so his face was closer to Louis’ face. “You’re so sweet,” Harry spoke as he pressed a quick kiss to the tip of Louis’ nose. “And charming,” he continued, with another kiss, “And loveable, and pretty, and wonderful,” he finished, kissing Louis’ nose between each adjective.

Louis scrunched his nose, overwhelmed at the praise. Pretty. Harry said he was pretty. He felt a sudden tightness in his throat. He shook his head gently, unable to acknowledge the complements.

“No, I mean it, babe,” Harry said softly as he shifted his body to lie gently on top of Louis, pulling Louis underneath him. Harry braced himself on one elbow and reached down to grab one of Louis’ hands. He brought it up to his mouth and began kissing Louis’ fingertips.

Louis bit his lip to stop himself from grinning widely. Harry kissed each finger one by one right at Louis’ fingernails. Harry rubbed his lips across the smooth polish. He let his tongue wander across Louis’ fingers as well, licking and sucking each one.

Louis let out a soft purr at the touch of Harry’s tongue on his delicate fingertips. He let himself let go, just a little, snuggling into Harry’s side and allowing Harry to take the lead.

Harry kissed down Louis’ hand and around his wrist. He then moved up to Louis’ face, kissing his jaw and cheek, and then over to his lips. He kissed Louis on the mouth softly and slowly. Louis kissed back lazily, letting his mouth open up to Harry. Harry licked across Louis’ lips and flicked at his tongue with his own tongue.

Harry shifted his weight again so he was fully on top of Louis, propping himself on his elbows. He pressed into Louis’ lips with his own, going deeper and more passionately into the kisses. They worked up a slow rhythm, moving their lips and tongues around one another’s.

Harry began to grind his hips down into Louis’. He wasn’t rough but instead moved with a tender and loving grace. Louis was responding quickly to the motions, he had already been somewhat aroused just at Harry’s words of praise. Harry moved his mouth from Louis’ and kissed all over his jaw and neck, licking and sucking little bruises into the flesh.

Louis moaned with pleasure. Harry smiled at Louis’ moan, he loved his little noises. Harry slowly worked his way down Louis’ body, flicking his tongue over Louis’ nipples and then moving further downward.

He reached Louis’ hips and began to kiss Louis’ hardness through his boxers. Louis let out a breathy moan at the sudden localized pleasure. Harry could tell Louis was more aroused than usual, and in a slightly different way. He wasn’t sure what had changed, but he was willing to go along with it. It was more tender than usual, softer in a way.

Harry nuzzled his face into Louis’ crotch and groaned. Louis gasped with pleasure at the unique vibrating sensation that Harry’s groan had caused. Harry continued to mouth at Louis’ cock through the thin cotton as he grasped onto Louis’ thighs.

Harry finally let his hands wander up to the waistband of Louis’ boxers and he pulled gently, ever so slowly pulling Louis’ boxers down, letting his cock spring out. Now past Louis’ crotch, Harry quickly pulled the boxers off the rest of the way and moved back to Louis’ crotch. He kissed all over Louis’ inner thighs and sucked at the delicate skin.

He licked and kissed his way up to Louis’ cock, hard and fat and leaking already. Louis gasped again when Harry ran his tongue up Louis’ shaft. He stopped at the tip and delivered several short licks to the slit, and then moved back down to repeat the motion.

Louis was panting already and letting little breathy moans and squeaks escape his lips. He couldn’t help it. What Harry did to him was like nothing else he had ever experienced. But there was something he wanted. He reached down and grasped Harry’s hair. It was almost too much.

“Harry, Harry,” he pleaded.

“What is it, babe?” Harry asked between licks. He had his hands on Louis now, kneading his thighs and his hips.

“Can you… can you say some of the stuff you were saying before?” Louis asked through his pants.

“Yeah of course,” Harry agreed, peppering several kisses across Louis’ hip bones now. “You’re so beautiful and wonderful… and perfect,” Harry said between kisses. “You’re perfect, Lou,” he finished, taking Louis fully into his mouth now.

Louis moaned, relishing the hot wetness. But what Harry had said wasn’t exactly what he had been looking for.

“No, I… I mean…” he tried to say. He was becoming overwhelmed and desperate. He gasped as Harry took Louis fully into his mouth and into the back of his throat, bottoming out and then pulling back.

Louis didn’t know how to say what he wanted. He felt embarrassed. He didn’t even know it was something he had wanted until a few minutes ago. He felt heat rising up to his face. He began to squirm, he couldn’t help it. Louis grasped the sheets, trying to calm himself but he already felt himself beginning to feel restless. He moved his hands back to Harry’s hair. Maybe feeling Harry’s warmth would ground him a bit. Harry sensed Louis’ discomfort and pulled his mouth off entirely.

“What do you need, babe?” he asked, looking up at Louis. Louis looked down at his fingers in Harry’s hair. The shiny blue stood out even in Harry’s dark hair. It was pretty. It made Louis feel pretty. He liked that. But how could he express that? It was such a strange thing. Why did he need this? He’s a boy; he shouldn’t enjoy being called pretty. He shouldn’t enjoy having his nails painted. He shouldn’t be thinking about what other colors would look lovely against his skin…

Louis gazed up at the ceiling and then he scrunched his eyes shut. What was wrong with him? This isn’t normal. Louis began chewing on his bottom lip again. Harry watched Louis’ face contort with discomfort. He was in his head, he was getting anxious.

“Lou? Where’d you go, babe?” Harry asked as he crawled back up Louis’ body. Louis pulled his mind back to the present. Harry was looking at him, a strange expression on his face. “You okay, Louis?” Harry asked. He had both hands on Louis now, one gripping his shoulder and another on his jaw, stroking Louis’ skin with his thumb.

“Yeah, yeah… I just… I don’t know…” Louis spoke softly. He felt his throat tightening again. His gaze was wandering the room, he didn’t want to look at Harry.

“Just tell me what it is. Really, Lou, just tell me. It can’t be that bad,” Harry tried to reassure him.

“It’s just weird,” Louis said, his voice catching in his throat.

Harry gave Louis a moment and then slowly reached his hand down and began to stroke Louis again. He thought maybe it would get him to relax and open up a bit. Louis looked down to Harry’s hand. Harry leaned in and kissed Louis’ temple.

“I’m sure it’s not too weird. Just tell me, babe. Please?” Harry asked, whispering into Louis’ ear now. Louis swallowed and took a deep breath. Harry was already doing what Louis needed; he just needed more of it.

“Just be gentle. And say gentle things, I guess,” Louis said softly. He felt his face getting hot again.

“Gentle? I can do that, that’s not weird,” Harry said quickly. He resumed kissing Louis along his hairline and down across his jaw. He continued to pump at Louis’ erection as he nibbled tenderly at his earlobe and neck.

Harry began to make his way down again. Louis felt frustrated. He wanted to be able to tell Harry exactly what it was he needed, but he couldn’t seem to get it out.

Harry took Louis into his mouth again and hollowed his cheek with suction. His mind was running through ideas of how to be gentle. What did that mean exactly? He bobbed up and down on Louis several times before pulling off and using his hands.

“You’re so perfect, Boo. So tender and sweet for me, my baby,” Harry tried. He hoped that was the right thing. He licked at Louis’ tip several times as he twisted and pumped with his hands. This seemed to be enough for now, Louis was beginning to moan again.

Harry took Louis in his mouth again and brought his hands down to Louis’ bum. He bobbed up and down on Louis’ cock as he squeezed Louis’ fleshy bum in his large hands.

Harry let his fingers wander to Louis’ hole and he pressed the pad of his index finger against it. Louis gasped lightly and let his legs fall open a little more. Harry rubbed his finger over Louis’ entrance, slowly, not wanting to cause a lot of friction as Louis was dry down there still.

Louis squirmed against the touch. “That’s it, babe. Feels good, yea?” Harry praised as he let Louis fall from his mouth. “You up for it tonight?” he asked as he pressed his finger slowly and gently inside Louis, barely past his fingernail. Louis squirmed a bit at the intrusion.

“Um… yes,” he spoke softly. Harry nodded and pulled himself up and away from Louis to grab the lube from the nightstand.

“You’re gonna like this. I’ll be really gentle,” Harry said as he settled himself back between Louis’ legs. He grasped Louis’ knees and pushed his legs up and open. Louis took in a sharp breath. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to being so exposed to Harry.

Harry lay down on his belly and pushed his face into Louis, kissing and nipping at the skin on his inner thighs. He took both hands and pressed them into Louis’ bum, spreading him open. He worked his way inward, leaving gentle kisses around Louis’ bum while he moved his fingers to stroke over his hole. He used two fingers to just glide over the top, just stroking him lovingly.

Finally Harry buried his face into Louis, mouth open, licking at him desperately. He delivered several quick kisses and licks to Louis’ hole before pulling back to look at him. Harry repositioned his fingers so his thumbs were pulling at Louis and stretching him out.

“You look so good Louis, so pretty like this,” Harry said before burying his face into him again. He began to thrust his tongue in and out of Louis rapidly, and twirled his tongue while inside. Louis was panting and whining with pleasure. His whole body was buzzing from the heat and from Harry’s words. It was that word he loved.

Harry delved his tongue in and out several more times and then licked a long stripe up from Louis’ hole up to his balls.

“Wanna be inside you now, babe,” Harry said as he pulled back. Louis nodded. Harry leaned up on his knees, still between Louis’ legs, and stoked himself several times. Then he positioned himself back over Louis and lined himself up with Louis’ entrance.

He pushed just the tip inside, and even just that light intrusion made Louis’ hips buck reflexively. “Yeah, s’good, right? You feel so good. So beautiful, babe,” Harry praised as he pressed in a bit deeper.

Harry crawled himself back up Louis’ body as he pressed in until he bottomed out, his face hovering just over Louis’ face. Harry kissed him deeply, thrusting his tongue into his mouth as he pressed in deep down below.

Harry began to slowly thrust in and out. He didn’t go fast or rough, he wanted it to be tender. That’s what Louis wanted. Harry reached down to grab Louis’ hand that was grasping the sheets. He brought it up to his mouth and began to suck at Louis’ fingers again, slow and sensual. He was leaning on one arm and thrusting, slow and steady, while his tongue explored Louis’ fingers. Louis watched Harry’s mouth all over his hand, lapping against the pretty deep blue of his fingernails.

“Harry?” Louis spoke softly.

“Hmm?” Harry hummed, Louis fingers in his mouth. Louis watched him for another moment. He shifted his hips underneath Harry. “You comfortable? It’s okay, yeah?” Harry asked as he pulled Louis’ fingers from his mouth. He still held his hand but shifted his body again so their hips were more in line and his lower abdomen was rubbing against Louis’ cock.

“No, I just… I wanted to you say that again,” Louis said, his face reddening.

“Say what?” Harry asked as he leaned down and pressed his lips to Louis’ cheek. Louis took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

“Say I’m… I’m pretty,” Louis said, so softly Harry had barely heard. But he did hear, and he smiled at the request.

“Of course, babe. You are pretty. So pretty!” Harry gushed as he peppered Louis with kisses. Louis’ heart fluttered at Harry’s words. “You are, Louis. You’re my pretty little Boo Bear. So pretty,” Harry continued as he kissed Louis gently all over his cheeks and neck.

Louis couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have a boyfriend like Harry. He was so kind and so gentle and he just wanted to do whatever Louis needed. Louis felt a tightness in his throat. Harry continued to thrust into him, gently but deeply.

“Could you… could you…” Louis stammered. But he felt tears welling up. He blinked rapidly. He couldn’t cry. Not now.

“You know I’ll do whatever you need, babe. Whatever you want, my pretty baby,” Harry spoke, still mouthing at Louis’ jaw.

“Kiss my nose?” Louis asked, his voice breaking.

“Yeah, shhhh. Sure, babe. Shhhh now. It’s okay,” Harry cooed as he kissed Louis’ nose softly and then pressed his own nose into him. Louis let a few tears leak out of his eyes and then he blinked rapidly again to try to clear them away. Harry let go of Louis’ hand and reached up, wiping away the tears with his thumb. “Nothing’s wrong, right? You’re just a bit overwhelmed?” Harry whispered, worry in his voice. Louis shook his head.

“No, no, nothing’s wrong. I just… yeah I’m just… overwhelmed,” Louis confirmed, his voice high in his throat and shaky. He took a deep but hitched breath.

Harry kissed Louis’ nose again. Louis forced a smile, taking in a shaky breath. Harry resumed his gentle thrusts, trying to work up a rhythm. He knew he was close but wasn’t sure where Louis was.

Louis still felt restless. He couldn’t decide what he wanted or needed. He couldn’t put it into words in his own head nonetheless speak them out loud. For the first time in a very long time he wasn’t comfortable, but he didn’t know why. Something was missing.

He found himself shifting his hips again. Harry stopped thrusting.

“What’s wrong, do you want me to pull out, babe?” Harry asked, concern growing in his gut. Louis was acting strangely. Harry couldn’t remember the last time Louis hadn’t fully enjoyed himself, if there ever had been a time.

“No no, don’t… that’s not…” Louis huffed, frustrated with himself. He felt tears welling up in his eyes again. He tried to blink them away but that just made a few fall down the side of his face. He couldn’t stop his lip from quivering.

Harry dropped his head and let out a frustrated huff. He noticed Louis was only half-hard now. “Louis, babe, why don’t we just stop?” he suggested. He reached up and tried to wipe Louis’ tears away again but Louis turned his head away from Harry’s hand.

Louis felt his erection lacking. He suddenly realized he wanted desperately to close his legs. He suddenly hated the idea of being splayed out. He felt like it was unattractive or something. He couldn’t put a better word to it. He straightened his legs so he was lying fully flat on the mattress.

Harry grunted at the strange change of position, at Louis closing himself off like that. He was still inside Louis but it felt wrong. He decided to pull out.

Louis clenched his jaw against the sensation. He squeezed his eyes shut. He hated that Harry had just had to pull out because of his discomfort. He was suddenly self-conscious and uncomfortable. He wanted to curl into himself but Harry was still on top of him.

“Louis, look at me,” Harry asked gently. Louis willed himself to look Harry in the eye. He had a concerned look on his face. “We don’t have to do this,” Harry said. Just those words made Louis want to cry. Harry was too good to him. He realized he needed to say something.

“Maybe just… just a different position?” Louis asked quietly.

“Anything you want,” Harry replied as he moved off Louis but remained pressed to his side.

“I just want…” Louis began. He was trying hard to put words to all the thoughts swimming through his mind. “I just want you to like… to hold me?” he tried. Harry nodded.

“Like, spooning maybe?” Harry asked. Louis nodded vigorously. That actually sounded nice. “Okay, roll onto your side, babe,” Harry instructed. Louis did as he was told, rolling to his side, facing away from Harry.

Harry immediately pressed his body right up behind Louis’, spooking him tightly. He reached an arm around the top of Louis’ waist and pulled him even closer, his hand splayed across Louis’ chest.

“This good?” Harry asked, leaning in close to Louis’ ear. Louis nodded again. This was much better.

Harry hooked his top leg around Louis’ legs and shifted his hips so his cock was pressed into Louis’ bum. He moved his hand off Louis’ chest for just a moment to position himself properly, and then pushed in, slowly and steadily. Louis gasped at the intrusion, but it was okay. He liked this position.

Harry brought his hand back around again and grasped Louis’ cock. He began to pump Louis in time with his thrusts, he moved gently. “Mmm, that’s perfect, Lou,” he purred softly into Louis’ ear. “This was a good idea. So perfect. And you look so pretty, baby,” he continued.

Louis moaned at the terms of affection. This was what he wanted. Harry pressed close to him, holding him. “Say more,” he pleaded softly.

“You’re so good, babe. So pretty and tight for me. You look so pretty, my baby,” Harry chanted as he thrust into Louis and tugged at his cock, working up a rhythm. Louis was letting out his breathy grunts now.

Harry worked like this for several minutes, building up slowly. He didn’t want to move to fast or too roughly. He wanted to do exactly as Louis wanted: gentle and tender. He nibbled at Louis’ hair and nudged his nose into Louis’ neck. Louis was responding favorably, moaning delicately, his small hand clasped around Harry’s hand that was on his cock.

“Louis, uughhh, you’re so perfect. So beautiful, mmmmhhhhh,” Harry panted out, moving a little faster now. He was getting close again. He could tell now that Louis was too. “Want you to come for me. Come for me, my pretty Boo,” Harry asked.

With a few more strokes Harry felt Louis coming, hard and strong. “Yes, yes,” Harry praised, “So good for me,” he continued as he worked Louis through his orgasm and felt himself finally fall over the edge as well. He came with a shudder, bucking his hips and pressing deep into Louis.

They lie there, tangled together, both coming down from their orgasms together, panting.

Harry pulled out after a moment. Louis curled his toes at the loss. He pressed his body impossibly tightly against Harry. Harry held him close for a moment but then pulled away.

“Where are you going?!” Louis asked, panic in his voice, as he reached around to grasp at Harry’s wrist.

“Just to grab some tissues, clean you up a bit,” Harry said soothingly. He reached over to the night stand and grabbed some tissues and then moved back into Louis.

Harry reached his arm around again to wipe the mess off Louis’ chest. Louis closed his eyes, relishing in the gentle touches, and the way Harry was taking care of him. Harry threw the tissues on the floor unceremoniously and curled himself back around Louis.

Louis felt that tightness in his throat again. He let a few tears fall and let himself sniffle once.

“It’s okay, babe. I’m here,” Harry whispered into Louis’ ear. Louis nodded. He took a shaky breath and tried to gather his thoughts, to makes sense of the emotions swimming through his mind and clawing at his heart.

This was different. It was something more complicated. He couldn’t understand it yet and wasn’t sure exactly where it had come from. A strange feeling had Louis’ stomach in knots.

He looked down to his hand that was grasped in Harry’s hand. The dark blue polish stood out against their paler skin tones. _Eventide Intrigue_.

There was something so intricate about the way Louis felt. It was something unusual, but special. He let his eyes fall closed. He listened to Harry’s deep breaths, felt his chest rise and fall against Louis’ back.

He felt small in Harry’s arms. And delicate. Delicate and pretty.

 

 

…


	2. Chapter 2

Louis awoke in the morning to an empty bed and a note on Harry’s pillow.

_Went for an early workout. Love you_

The note was signed with a heart. Louis gazed at the note in his hands, his blue thumbnail standing out against the white paper.

He knew he should go to the pharmacy today and pick up some nail polish remover. Louis frowned. Yes, it was time to get rid of the silly fantasy.

Louis rolled out of bed and started a shower. He let his mind wander as he lathered up his body and washed his hair. He wondered how easy it would be to find nail polish remover. He wondered if he would feel embarrassed going up to the check-out counter with blue fingernails and a bottle of nail polish remover. He wondered if the pharmacy would sell nail polish. He wondered what other colors might look good on his nails.

Thirty minutes later, Louis was driving to the pharmacy. He was honestly relieved that Harry had been out when he’d left the house. Louis wasn’t sure why, but he knew he wanted to do this on his own.

Louis had chosen a larger pharmacy that was out of the way. He was pretty sure he wouldn’t be recognized, but had put on a baseball hat and inconspicuous clothing just in case. He gazed around the big, brightly-lit store. He had no idea where to go. He supposed something like nail polish remover would be in one of the “girly” sections.

Louis moved down the aisles, gazing this way and that. He passed shampoo and body-wash and moisturizer and hair dyes. He stopped to gaze at the wall of makeup: a seemingly endless display of all sorts of products that Louis realized he didn’t have the slightest clue about. There was so much. He had never really looked before. But now that he was, Louis was overwhelmed.

He shook his head and continued through the aisles. He found himself amongst all sorts of makeup tools and accessories. There were strange metal tools of all shapes. There were mirrors that distorted his face unless he looked very closely. No, that was closer than he needed to see. There were brushes of all sizes with wooden handles and soft bristles. Louis moved towards the brushes. He took a moment to look if there was anybody watching him. There was nobody in sight.

Louis ran the pad of his index finger over one of the brushes that had its bristles exposed through the packaging. He smiled at the soft touch. It reminded him of getting makeup done for a red-carpet event.

Louis let his eyes wander down the aisle, and finally he spotted towards the end what he thought he was looking for. Tall bottles full of brightly colored liquid. Louis moved towards the shelf. He hadn’t realized there would be more than one kind. He read the labels.

He was confused by terms like “Advanced Revival.” There was polish remover for strengthening, for nourishing, for moisturizing. There was a bottle labeled “Non-acetone.” Several of the bottles said things like “Pro-vitamin formula” or “nail-whitening formula.”

Louis shook his head and frowned. He looked down at his nails. The polish was still perfect, shiny and smooth, the perfect glossy-hard coating. He looked back at the bottles.

There was one that was a pretty pale-pink color. The bottle said “strengthening.” Louis thought that sounded good to him; nothing wrong with strong fingernails. He plucked the bottle off the shelf and made his way back up the aisle.

Something caught Louis’ eye and he stopped. Hundreds of small glass vials lined a section of the makeup wall. Louis stared. He had no idea there were so many types of nail polish.

They were organized by brand and then subdivided by color. There were at least four different brands. Louis let his eyes sweep the shelves. His gaze landed on an array of greens.

Green. Louis looked down at his nails again. Green might look nice. He hadn’t thought about that. Louis looked around the store. It seemed to be nearly empty and he was standing at the edge anyway. He was not easily noticeable.

Louis looked back to the polish. He reached out one shaking hand. He ran his index finger along a row of glass bottles. He stopped at one that caught his eye. He looked around again.

Louis scooped up the bottle in his hand and took a step backwards. He slowly brought it up closer to his face. It was a lovely mint green color. He turned it over in his hand. He read the label. “Mint Mojito.”

Louis smiled in spite of himself. Harry loved mint mojitos. Louis loved the color.

Louis’ heart was racing. Was he seriously considering buying nail polish? He turned the little bottle over and over again in his hand. Louis let his eyes sweep down the rest of the aisle. It was an endless display of eye makeup and face makeup and shiny things for your lips and colorful pencils that Louis thought might be eye-liner. He had never even considered all the options for makeup. How did women choose what to use?

Louis wandered slowly down the aisle, gazing, eyes-wide at the selection. He grasped the nail polish firmly in his hand. He felt his heart pounding.

Louis came across a section of makeup in eye-catching packaging. He glanced at the label. Covergirl. Yes, he had heard of Covergirl. His eyes found the lipstick section. Further up was lip gloss. They were packaged differently.

Louis licked his lips. He realized he didn’t actually know the difference between lipstick and lip gloss. He frowned again. The lipstick seemed to come in dramatic colors: dark pinks, dark reds, and even shades of brown and blue. The lip gloss seemed to be lighter, putting more emphasis on translucence and subtle shine.

Louis whipped out his phone and opened Safari. He typed into the search bar: _difference between lip gloss and lipstick._

The result was overwhelming. Apparently there were also things called lip balm and lip stain and lip pencils. Louis shut his phone off and shoved it back in his pocket. He glared at the wall. He tried to picture what he would look like with a little color on his lips.

Harry had always had naturally beautiful lips: the perfect berry-red color. But Louis had always hated his lips. They were thin and pale. He thought some color might look nice, or a bit of silky shimmer.

Louis huffed audibly. He was beginning to get frustrated at his lack of knowledge. He had absolutely no idea what to do or where to start. On top of that, he couldn’t shake the nagging insecurities. He knew full well that it wasn’t normal for boys to be interested in makeup. But what did “normal” mean anyway?

Louis wondered if Harry would like it. He had seemed more than open to the idea of Louis wearing nail polish. But Louis supposed that was a bit different. Perrie offering to paint Louis’ nails was a very different scenario than Louis actively going to the store to but makeup to wear.

Louis shook his head. He was getting ahead of himself. He didn’t even know the first thing about makeup or what to choose. Louis let his gaze sweep the makeup wall again. He hadn’t even begun to think about all the possibilities. Eye makeup was other one. Harry had always loved Louis’ eyelashes. Would he like them even more with a little mascara?

Louis looked around the Covergirl shelves. His gaze landed on what appeared to be the tubes of mascara. He stepped closer.

“Eye-enhancing,” “Long-lasting,” “waterproof,” “volumizing,” “mega-curl.” Louis was overwhelmed again already. And there were different colors too. Louis was amazed. He had no idea there were different colors of mascara. He had thought they were all black. And even the black wasn’t just “black.” There was jet-black and soot-black and smoky-black and something called “blackest black.” Louis was absolutely perplexed.

He thought about all the women he knew. Louis wondered, how was it that he could be so surrounded by women his entire life and yet have not even the first clue about makeup? He thought about Perrie again. She seemed to have a great grasp on makeup. She was always experimenting with it. Louis wondered if he could ask her about it. She had always been open-minded and easygoing, like Zayn.

Louis thought about it. He turned the little nail polish bottle over in his hand again. It was getting sweaty in his grasp. He wondered if he should even be going down this road. But now that he was here, he felt like he couldn’t shake the idea. He didn’t want to.

Louis made the decision quickly. He whipped out his phone and scrolled to Perrie’s number and pressed send. She answered quickly.

“Hey, doll,” Perrie drawled in her thick Northern accent.

“Hey, it’s Louis,” Louis stammered. Now that he was on the phone he found himself suddenly nervous.

“I know, what’s up, babe?” Perrie responded casually. Louis took a deep breath.

“Well, I was wondering if…” Louis wasn’t sure how to word this. “If you could help me with the nail polish remover? I’m at the store now.”

“It’s not that hard, Lou,” Perrie said through a giggle. Louis felt himself blushing.

“Well yeah… it’s just there’s a lot of varieties and… and I wasn’t sure…” Louis was babbling. Perrie laughed again.

“Do you want to come over?” she asked. Louis nodded and then realized she couldn’t see him.

“Yes, if that’s okay,” Louis said, relieved.

Louis ended the call and made his way up to the checkout counter. He got on line and only then did he realize he still had “Mint Mojito” in his hand. He looked at the little bottle. He looked at his blue fingernails. He looked around the store. Nobody was paying him any attention.

When he got up to the counter, Louis put the nail polish and remover tentatively down on the countertop. The young man at checkout was completely oblivious. He hadn’t even looked up at Louis.

Louis was chewing on his lip. He looked around anxiously.

“Six seventy-two,” the young man said, finally looking up at Louis. He seemed surprised to see a boy standing in front of him. He looked down at Louis’ items.

Louis fumbled with his wallet and swiped his credit card as fast as he could. The clerk bagged his two items and Louis headed for the door as quickly as he could without attracting attention.

~

Louis’ hands were shaking on the steering wheel the entire drive to Zayn and Perrie’s house. Louis hoped Zayn wouldn’t be home. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to see him, he was simply unsure if he could share this strange new thing with anyone yet. He even thought Perrie was a slight risk.

Perrie invited Louis in happily. Louis was clutching the plastic bag in his sweaty palm.

“Zayn’s not home. He’s out with his cousins,” Perrie said as she led Louis upstairs. She could sense something was up with Louis but didn’t press the matter. Louis breathed a sigh of relief upon hearing Zayn was out.

Perrie led Louis into the master bathroom. “You’ll need a few cotton balls. And it’s super easy,” Perrie said as she rummaged through a cabinet. Louis was standing awkwardly in the doorway. She looked up at Louis standing in one place. “Well, let’s get on with it,” Perrie said through a laugh. Louis smiled as he walked forward. Perrie grabbed his hand and pressed it palm-down on the granite counter. She took the bag from Louis’ hands and reached in to grab the remover. She took pause.

“You bought polish?” she asked, a steady tone to her voice. Louis squeezed his eyes shut. He had forgotten to take that out of the bag. Perrie was already reaching in and grabbing the polish bottle out of the bag. She threw the empty bag to the side.

“Um… yeah I… I dunno why…” Louis began rambling. Perrie put the polish remover down on the counter and looked closely at the polish.

“This is a good brand. And a lovely color,” Perrie said warmly. Louis smiled back through his nerves. He felt his face getting hot. “Did you want me to take off the blue and use this color, now?” Perrie asked as she got to work, taking a cotton ball and saturating it with the nail polish remover.

“No… no that’s okay,” Louis said softly. Perrie pressed her left hand into the top of Louis’ hand to keep him still, and then began to sweep the wet cotton ball over his pinky fingernail. Louis watched the polish come off in smears and smudges.

The cotton ball was blue and grungy in moments. Perrie threw it into the sink and moved on to another one. It took her several minutes to wipe off the polish from all ten fingers. She worked in silence. Louis was too nervous to talk. He felt butterflies in his stomach and his heart was racing. He had no idea how to approach the topic he was so curious about.

When Perrie was done she instructed Louis to wash his hands. He lathered his hands, staring down at them and at the blue cotton balls still in the sink. He felt himself feeling a little sad that the polish was gone. His fingers were bare. He had already gotten used to the color there.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to do that green color?” Perrie asked as she cleaned up the countertop.

“Nah,” Louis responded quickly. But he thought he should take the opportunity to address why he had really come here. And he could tell Perrie was waiting for that as well. “Although, I was at the store and… and I noticed they have a lot of other… there’s a lot of makeup out there,” Louis said, trying to sound as casual as possible.

“Oh yeah, there’s loads. And that’s just the cheaper stuff. You go to Harrods and you’ll find all sorts of crazy stuff,” Perrie responded as she leaned her hip against the vanity. Louis nodded. He began chewing on his lip again. Perrie looked at him for a moment. “Would you like to see some of the stuff I have?” Perrie asked.

Louis blushed again and smiled. Yes. That was what he wanted. But he couldn’t bring himself to say yes.

But he didn’t need to. Perrie stood up straight and grabbed Louis’ hand. She pulled him out of the bathroom and into the giant closet she shared with Zayn.

“Well this is where I keep everything,” Perrie announced as she pulled Louis over to a low counter with a stool pulled up to it and a giant mirror behind, framed with large glowing light bulbs. Louis was impressed. Perrie immediately began rummaging through plastic containers filled with various brushes and pencils and metallic tools and makeup pots.

Louis watched her pull several different things out and lay them on the counter. She was speaking out loud, to herself as much to Louis, as she rummaged through her stuff.

“Oh, this is the perfect shade for you. And this color would be great. Oh, and you’d love this, babe,” she spoke as she arranged some curious things in front of Louis. Louis looked at the collection. It was overwhelming. He didn’t know what more than half of it even was. He picked up a black tube. He thought it might be something for your eyes.

“Oh, that’s liquid liner,” Perrie stated, “Makes your eyes a bit darker, and more defined.” Louis put it back down.

“I don’t think… I don’t know,” Louis stammered. He realized he was being quiet and not himself. Perrie was being so accommodating, bringing Louis into her closet and showing him all these personal things. He couldn’t shake his nagging doubts. This was not normal. He shouldn’t be going down this road. He shouldn’t be into this stuff.

“Yeah, eyeliner might be a bit much. But mascara would look great on you,” Perrie was saying as she picked up another tube.

“Mascara?” Louis asked.

“Yeah. It adds just a subtle darkness. And defines your lashes,” Perrie continued as she unscrewed the cap. “Sit,” she demanded, pointing to the little stool. Louis decided to go along with what Perrie wanted to do. There couldn’t be any harm in just letting her do her thing.

Perrie immediately put her hand on Louis’ forehead and tilted his head back. “You have great eyelashes,” she observed. She brought the mascara wand to Louis’ face. He instinctually squinted his eyes. “Babe, no squinting. Trust me, I’m not going to poke your eye,” Perrie said through a giggle as she kept a firm hand on Louis’ forehead.

“Okay,” Louis said. He blinked a few times and then kept his eyes open. Perrie worked quickly, sweeping the mascara over Louis’ eyelashes. She stood back when she was done.

“Beautiful!” she declared. Louis turned to look into Perrie’s mirror.

It was different. Very different. Louis grasped his hands on the counter and leaned forward to get a better look. His eyes were suddenly transformed. She shape was more defined. His lashes looked long and thick. He quite liked it.

“You like?” Perrie asked as she put the mascara away.

“Yeah… yeah I do,” Louis confirmed hesitantly. Perrie smiled.

“What about lip gloss? I think that would be a perfect little touch. Nothing dramatic, just a little shine and some slight color. Yeah?” Perrie said as she dug through a makeup bag.

Louis licked his lips again and continued to look into the mirror. He figured now would be the best time to ask his question.

“So what exactly is the difference between lip gloss and lipstick?” he asked tentatively.

“Oh, well lip stick is waxier and more substantial. It’s good for bold color,” Perrie explained as she found a tube of lipstick. She popped off the lid and twisted the base until the deep red lipstick could be seen. “See? This is for the drama,” she continued. She then picked up a tube of lip gloss and unscrewed the lid, pulling the wand out which was coated in a viscous translucent-pink goo. “And lip gloss is more for adding some subtle shine. It also comes in different scents,” she said as she waved the wand under her nose. She dropped it under Louis’ nose as well. He inhaled the scent of the lip gloss. It was sweet, like strawberries.

“You want?” Perrie asked. Louis stared at his reflection again. His heart was racing. Perrie watched him curiously. This didn’t have to be a commitment, Louis decided. It could just be this one time. He nodded to Perrie.

Perrie lifted Louis’ chin with one hand and gently applied the lip gloss with the other. She pulled away and observed Louis’ lips when she finished. “Rub your lips together,” she instructed. Louis did as he was told and looked into the mirror once again.

He was surprised. It looked good. Subtle, yet noticeable. It was pretty. It made his lips stand out a bit more. “Wow,” he exclaimed.

“Good wow?” Perrie asked as she put some things away.

“Yeah. It looks… nice. It’s… it’s pretty,” Louis said softly, his face reddening with the last word. Perrie smiled widely at this. She was clearly having a good time.

“Well, I’m glad you like it,” she said simply. “And it’s just the right amount. It’s all you need. Some definition in your eyes, and some color on your lips. Perfection.”

Louis smiled shyly again. He was gazing into the mirror. The makeup made his face look different, but in a good way. He liked the subtle transformation. He rubbed his lips together again. The color was perfect, delicate but noticeable. It defined the shape of his lips in an elegant way, made them stand out against his skin. He decided to be a little more bold.

“So if I was to get some of this… myself. For myself, I mean. I should go with just mascara and lip gloss?” he asked softly.

“That’s where I would start. Black mascara and some light gloss looks great on you,” Perrie replied. She was watching him now. “I didn’t know you were into this stuff,” she said, trying to be delicate. Louis felt his face heating up again.

“I’m not really,” he said quickly. “I just wanted to try it out I guess,” he added, hoping he didn’t sound completely ridiculous.

“No, it’s all good. I know guys who wear makeup,” she said. Louis nodded. He thought he should clarify another thing.

“Don’t tell Zayn. If you don’t mind. I just don’t want… I mean… I’m not even gonna tell Harry,” Louis stammered.

“Oh, I won’t,” Perrie confirmed. “But why aren’t you telling Harry?” Louis wondered that himself for a moment. He wasn’t sure. He hadn’t thought about why.

“I don’t know. He just doesn’t need to know. Not yet at least,” Louis said.

“Okay. It’s nothing to be ashamed of though, Lou,” Perrie responded.

“I’m not ashamed!” Louis replied defensively.

“Okay, okay!” Perrie said, holding her hands up defensively. “Here’s some remover. Take one pad and just wipe it across your eye until the darkness is gone,” she said as she handed Louis a small container.

“Oh,” Louis said, surprised. He hadn’t thought about taking it off. He stood up and took the container from Perrie. He opened it and grasped one of the moist pads out. He leaned in close to the mirror and began to sweep it across his eyelashes.

When the eye-makeup was gone he looked at himself again. He looked tired now without the accentuation on his eyes.

“The lip gloss you can just blot off with a tissue,” Perrie said.

“Well thanks, Perrie. This was… helpful,” Louis offered.

“Of course. Any time, babe,” Perrie replied.

“I guess I should get going. Harry will be home soon,” Louis said as he began to make his way out of the closet.

“Okay, babe. And don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.” Louis laughed nervously as he and Perrie made their way downstairs.

~

Louis got into his car and looked at his phone. He had a text from Harry saying he was stopping at the food store, and asking if Louis wanted anything. Louis breathed a sigh of relief. He wondered if he could get back to the pharmacy and home in time to hide whatever he ended up buying before Harry questioned him about it. Now that he was alone, he let himself think for a moment. His mind swam with ideas, with potential consequences of this road he was on.

What if it was too much for Harry? What if someone else found out? And underneath those questions was the real concern that was clawing at his mind: what did this all mean?

Louis shook his head. He didn’t want to contemplate that now. It didn’t have to mean anything. He just liked the way it looked. He liked feeling soft and pretty. He liked the idea of Harry thinking he was pretty. Louis thought about the night before. Harry had been so willing to give Louis exactly what he wanted, without question. And it had been strange, and Harry would’ve been well within reason to question it. It wasn’t every day that Louis asked to be called pretty.

But Harry had so willingly obliged. Maybe it wasn’t that strange after all? Louis felt butterflies his stomach recalling the night before. Harry had been soft and loving and had praised Louis and kissed his nose and called him all the right things. It was exactly what Louis had wanted, and now that the door had been opened, Louis felt like he couldn’t close it. He didn’t want to.

~

When Louis got back to the pharmacy he made a bee-line for the cosmetics aisle. He found the Covergirl section again, figuring he may as well stick with a familiar brand and narrow down the options. He grabbed a “jet-black” mascara and moved to the lip gloss. There were a healthy number of options, but Louis decided on a rosy pink. The package said it smelled like strawberries. Louis thought that might be nice.

He quickly turned and began to make his way to the checkout counter. On his way, Louis found himself in the aisle with body and face washes. He stopped for a moment. There were so many options Louis had never considered before. He always went with Axe brand, but there were others. Here on the shelves there were gels with little sparkling beads in them, and scents of all kinds.

Louis scanned the shelves. His eyes landed on a bright pink body wash with a picture of a grapefruit on the label. He looked around and then grabbed it off the shelf. The label said it smelled like red grapefruit. Louis popped the cap open with his thumb and brought the bottle up under his nose.

He inhaled the lovely, fruity scent. It was amazing. He wondered why he had never considered other body washes in the past. And this was something he wouldn’t necessarily have to hide from Harry. Harry wouldn’t mind Louis trying out something like this. He may even like the smell. Louis decided to buy it.

He looked down at the items in his hands and his face flushed red. He looked over to the checkout counter. There was an old lady behind the counter now. Louis breathed a sigh of relief. An old lady most likely wouldn’t judge him.

~

Harry wasn’t home yet when Louis arrived. Louis ran quickly upstairs to find a hiding place for his purchases. He shoved the mascara, lip gloss, and green nail polish in the far back of one of their bathroom drawers. Then he took the body wash and placed it gingerly on shelf in the shower next to their other bath products. He wondered what Harry’s reaction would be when he saw it.

Just as Louis was having that thought, he heard the garage door opening downstairs. Harry was home from his errands and workout. It looked like Louis would be finding out soon just how open-minded Harry would be.

Louis walked out into the master bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed and waited for Harry. “I’m home!” he heard Harry yell from downstairs as he walked in the door. Louis smiled to himself. Harry always had to announce his presence through the house.

Louis listened to Harry stomping up the staircase. “Hey babe!” Harry greeted Louis warmly as he strode into the bedroom.

“Hey,” Louis replied. Harry looked fantastic. He was sweaty and glowing, his shirt sticking to his torso, accentuating his muscular frame. Harry walked over to Louis on the bed and put his hand under his chin, lifting his head, and gave Louis a quick peck on the lips.

“How was your morning?” Harry asked as he toed off his shoes and pulled his socks off.

“It was good. I went to the pharmacy,” Louis stated.

“Yeah?” Harry replied as he pulled his shirt over his head. He walked into their shared closed as he spoke, “Done with the nail polish, then? It was beginning to grow on me.”

Louis smiled and looked down. He glanced at his fingernails. “I suppose,” he offered noncommittally. He wondered for a brief moment if he should just tell Harry what he had bought. But he shook his head. He didn’t think even he was ready for that.

Louis bit his bottom lip. Why had he bought those things? What was he trying to do? Who was he trying to be? He felt his brow furrow in confusion. Suddenly he doubted himself. Maybe he had simply gotten caught up in a moment. It was stupid really, buying the makeup. It was a silly, rash decision. Louis shook his head, suddenly frustrated with himself.

“It was cute, really,” Harry said, suddenly appearing in the closet doorway. He noticed Louis’ face. “What’s wrong, babe?”

Louis looked up at Harry and tried his best to change his expression. “No, nothing.”

Harry smiled and walked slowly over to Louis. He was wearing only tiny black briefs. “Maybe you’d like to join me in the shower?” Harry asked with a sly grin. He walked up in front of Louis and put his hands on Louis’ shoulders.

“Typical Harry, coming back from a workout horny as hell,” Louis joked as he grasped Harry’s hips.

“You love it,” Harry said as he bent down and kissed Louis on the nose.

“You smell bad,” Louis observed as he wrinkled his nose in mock-disgust.

“Which is why it’s shower time!” Harry replied enthusiastically as he stepped back and grabbed Louis’ hands. He began to walk backwards, pulling Louis until Louis had to stand up off the bed.

Harry pulled Louis into the bathroom with both hands, not breaking eye contact. Louis felt his heart beginning to race. Harry would see the grapefruit body wash any minute.

Once they were in the bathroom, Harry turned around and reached into the shower to turn on the faucet. Louis watched him carefully.

Harry turned back to Louis. “You’ll need to be a little more naked for this probably,” Harry teased.

Louis laughed and began to undress. Harry watched Louis as he pulled off his own briefs. Harry was already half-hard. “Something at the gym get your blood pumping, did it?” Louis ribbed, nodding to Harry’s hard-on.

“Yeah, thinking about you,” Harry replied as he stepped forward and grabbed Louis’ face with both hands and pulled him into a sloppy kiss.

Louis opened his mouth to Harry’s tongue. “You’re never not horny are you, Styles?” Louis teased again as he pulled back, hands holding Harry’s biceps. Harry just smirked as he grabbed Louis’ hand and pulled him in to the shower.

Harry pushed Louis up against the tiled shower wall and closed the glass door behind him. He made his way over to Louis, a hungry look in his eye.

“We haven’t done the shower thing in a while,” Louis observed as Harry began to kiss and bite all over Louis’ collarbones and neck. Harry’s response was a moan as he licked at Louis’ skin. He pulled back, tugging Louis with him into the spray of the water.

Once they were both under the hot water, Harry pulled Louis into another kiss, this time deep and full. They moved their mouths together easily, in perfect rhythm like they had done thousands of times before.

Harry hugged Louis, pressing their bodies together. Even their feet were pressed together at the sides as they stood under the water, kissing with fervor.

Louis had his arms over Harry’s shoulders and his hands in Harry’s hair. He combed his fingers through his hair. It was damp with sweat. They kissed under the spray of water for several minutes, nails digging at each other, Harry’s erection full now and pressing up against Louis’ thigh.

Harry pulled back after a while. “I should probably wash my hair,” Harry said with a smirk. He tilted his neck back and shook his head, throwing little droplets of water everywhere. Louis laughed with delight, still holding onto Harry’s shoulders. Harry turned around and backed up, tilting his head under the water.

Louis watched Harry from behind. His broad shoulders were glistening with wetness, a stream of water running down between his shoulder blades. Louis couldn’t help but reach out and run his finger along Harry’s spine, all the way down to his bum.

Harry shivered at the intimate touch. He pulled his head out from under the spray, sweeping his drenched hair back with both hands. He leaned down and delivered several quick kisses to Louis’ lips before reaching behind him to grab the shampoo.

“What is that, body wash?” Harry asked as he poured shampoo into his hands, nodding towards the bottles on the shelf.

“Oh yeah. I… bought that today,” Louis confirmed as he scooped his hands into Harry’s hands, stealing some shampoo. He tried to sound casual.

“What does it smell like?” Harry asked as he began to lather up his hair.

“Uh, grapefruit,” Louis replied, “I just thought it’d be a nice change.” He began to wash his own hair, forgetting in his nervous state that he had already showered this morning.

“Sounds good,” Harry said with a smile. Louis breathed a sigh of relief. He then smiled at himself for having gotten worked up about it in the first place. “What are you smiling about?” Harry asked, gazing fondly at Louis as he stepped backwards into the water to rinse his hair.

“Nothing,” Louis replied, “I just love you.” Louis walked forward and reached out for Harry. He began to run his hands up and down Harry’s sides.

They switched places, Louis under the water now, rinsing his hair. Harry grabbed the grapefruit body wash and popped the cap open. He waved the open bottle under his nose. “Smells great,” Harry said.

Harry poured some of the pink, sweet-smelling gel into his hands. He rubbed them together, and then began to rub up and down his sleek, tanned chest. Louis watched him, biting his lip again.

Harry looked over to Louis and smiled. He moved his hands from his own body to Louis’. Harry rubbed up and down Louis’ chest and abdomen, getting him good and soapy.

Louis felt his cock twitch when Harry’s hands approached his crotch, but Harry dragged his hands back up again and around to Louis’ back. He pulled Louis in for another kiss.

Harry walked forward, pushing Louis back under the stream of water. They stood there kissing languidly again, their mouths working together, hot and wet and slow. Harry licked into Louis and licked all over his lips. Louis brought his hands to Harry’s chest, rubbing over his hard pecks and down to his abdomen, then back up again.

Harry pressed his hips into Louis and pushed his thigh between Louis’ legs. Louis groaned into the kiss when Harry’s thigh pressed against his erection.

But Harry pulled back as quickly as he had gotten there. “Smells so good, babe. You did good,” Harry praised as he twisted around to grab the bottle again. Louis smiled and nipped at Harry’s collarbones.

Harry dumped a generous amount of the delicious smelling soap into his hand. He rubbed his hands together again and brought his hands back to Louis. This time he started at Louis’ chest, rubbing circles over his nipples, his fingers sleek with soap.

Louis closed his eyes and tilted his head down. The stimulation was intense. Harry worked at Louis’ nipples for several seconds, twisting and teasing him. Harry then moved further down, grazing Louis’ abs and then down to his thighs. Harry squeezed Louis’ thighs with both hands and then moved forward to his cock.

He teased Louis with just one moment of palming action on his erection, but then moved both hands back around to his bum. Louis huffed with frustration at the lack of attention on his harness, but knew Harry wanted to draw out the pleasure.

Louis brought his hands to Harry’s hips and began to thumb across the sleek skin. Harry had his hands on Louis’ bum now, kneading and squeezing and then pulling back and scraping his fingernails over the meaty flesh.

Louis loved when Harry paid attention to his bum. He could never get enough. Louis let his forehead rest on Harry’s shoulder, pressing his body into Harry’s.

It wasn’t long before Harry had his fingertips at Louis’ hole, using the body wash as lubrication as he rubbed over him several times, teasing.

Louis bit Harry’s shoulder with the anticipation of pleasure. Harry took both hands and grasped Louis’ bum cheeks, pressing outwards. He let his thumbs tease over Louis’ hole and then press inside momentarily before pulling back. Louis was gripping Harry tightly and groaning now. Harry kept up the teasing, using his index fingers now to press momentarily into Louis and then pull out again.

Finally Harry pulled back entirely, “Turn around,” he instructed. Louis turned quickly, leaning against the shower wall now, both palms pressed into the wet, cool tile. Harry pressed up behind Louis and to his side. He brought one hand back to Louis’ bum and the other hand around to grasp at Louis’ dick.

Harry stroked tantalizingly slowly at Louis’ cock as the other hand found Louis’ hole again. He pressed one finger in deep; Louis was still slick with water and soap. Harry’s finger glided in effortlessly. He pulled back out. Louis was shaking against the wall, Harry pressed right up to his side. He had his eyes closed and mouth open, his legs spread wide. His whole body was buzzing with heat and arousal.

Harry was relentless with his finger, but never grazed Louis’ prostate or worked his hand too quickly over his cock. He didn’t wand Louis to come just yet. Nevertheless, Harry couldn’t help pressing his own erection into Louis’ hip. He rocked his hips into Louis’ side several times as he used both hands on him.

Louis felt himself giving in to Harry. With Harry’s hands all over him, one hand in his bum and one hand on his cock, he was completely at Harry’s mercy. He bucked his hips to get more out of Harry’s touch. Harry was moving tantalizingly slowly, tugging gently at Louis’ cock and pushing his fingers inside with absolutely no rush.

Harry twisted his fingers inside Louis and curled them just enough to make Louis shiver. He thumbed over the tip of Louis’ cock and stroked gently, not quick enough to get Louis off but enough to keep him building steadily, teetering on the edge. He also rocked his own erection into Louis’ hips still, pressing against his sleek skin.

Louis’ arousal was building quickly. “Harry I’m close,” he warned. Harry pulled back and grabbed Louis by the shoulders, turning him again so they were face to face.

“Kiss me,” Harry instructed. They crashed their lips together once again. The kiss was full of lust and arousal this time. They kissed frantically and passionately. Harry placed his hands on Louis’ waist and positioned him so their erections were lined up, pressed together.

Harry then reached down and grabbed both of them at once. Louis gasped at the sudden pressure again. Harry began pumping his fist quickly now, both himself and Louis in one hand. He didn’t want to hold out any longer. Louis felt like his legs were going to give out, he was so aroused. He gripped Harry’s shoulders firmly and pressed his face, open-mouthed, into Harry’s neck.

Louis was panting against Harry’s neck as Harry worked at them, tugging quickly. Harry thumbed over their tips several times, eliciting a squeak from Louis, and then pumped up and down again, varying the speed. Harry felt Louis beginning to go limp, so he reached his free arm around Louis’ waist, holding him firmly.

“I’m close, are you?” he grunted into Louis’ ear. Louis nodded quickly, bucking his hips to meet Harry’s enthusiastic tugging. He loved when Harry rubbed them together like this. If felt more intimate somehow. Louis closed his eyes. He just wanted to feel and listen.

Harry was letting out low grunts with every pull. His hand slid easily over them now, hard and fast. Louis couldn’t help pressing himself hard into Harry, pushing their bodies together even further. He couldn’t get enough. He loved the feel of Harry’s big hand on him, and Harry’s cock pressed up against his, their bodies pressed together in the most personal way. Harry could feel Louis getting overwhelmed.

“So good, babe. You feel so good,” Harry spoke, out of breath. “You’re so beautiful,” he praised as he kissed the side of Louis’ head. Louis squeezed his eyes shut and gripped Harry harder.

Harry kept at it. He twisted his hand expertly and squeezed hard on his and Louis’ erections, keeping a firm grip. The shower was echoing with Harry’s guttural moans and Louis’ higher whines.

Another few pulls and Louis came with a high groan. He clutched at Harry’s shoulders for support as his orgasm swept through him. Harry worked him through it until he came himself. They had both spilled all over their chests, and Harry simply turned their bodies so the water was spraying between them, washing away all the messiness.

They stood, clutching each other, for several minutes, both boys panting heavily. Louis leaned his head on Harry’s shoulder again. Harry pressed his cheek into the side of Louis’ head.

“I love you so much,” Harry whispered finally. Louis smiled against Harry’s shoulder. He felt butterflies. He loved that he could still feel those butterflies after all these years.

“I love you too, Harry,” Louis whispered back. He held on tight. Harry let go of their softening cocks and reached his arm around Louis, pulling his closer still. Louis had forgotten all his worries and doubts from earlier. He couldn’t think of anything but Harry.

The water was beginning to go lukewarm, but neither boy wanted to let go.


	3. Chapter Three

It had been four days since Louis had taken off the blue nail polish and bought the other cosmetics. On the first day Louis had consciously forced himself not to think about the items he had shoved in the back of the drawer. On the second day Louis’ curiosity had gotten the best of him, and he cautiously opened the drawer. He had gazed at the items and then shut the drawer, cursing himself for even having bought anything. On the third morning, Louis had opened the drawer again, but shut it quickly. At night on the third day, Louis opened the drawer and took out the items: green nail polish, black mascara, pink lip gloss. He lined them up delicately on the counter and stared at them. Then he shoved them back into the drawer.

It was the morning of the fourth day, and Louis again had his three items lined up again on the bathroom counter top. He was staring at them, wondering what to do. Everything in him craved that makeup, but he was wrestling between his head and his heart.

Harry would be out for the whole morning. Louis thought he should try to busy himself with other things in order to keep his mind off of it. He made the bed and separated the dirty laundry into piles and transferred a spider outdoors. But his mind kept going back to the makeup. _His_ makeup.

But it was silly to buy something and never use it, Louis found himself thinking. And soon enough, he found himself back in the bathroom, staring at the nail polish, the lip gloss, and the mascara.

He picked up the lip gloss tube and brought it close to his face. The color was called “strawberry kiss.” Louis unscrewed the lid and pulled the wand out of the base. The liquid was gooey and shimmering and he could smell the sweetness of it even at a distance. He brought it closer to his nose and inhaled. The scent was lovely. Louis thought for one wild moment that maybe Harry would even like the smell.

Louis stared at it for a moment, the lip gloss want clutched in his hand. His eyes darted to his reflection in the mirror. He licked his lips.

Louis stepped forward, pressing his hips into the counter top. He leaned forward and very, very slowly brought the lip gloss wand up to his mouth. His mind was racing, but he willingly shoved all the fear and doubt out of his consciousness and decided to simply go for it.

With incredible care and precision, Louis swiped the fuzzy head of the lip gloss wand against his lower lip in back-and-forth motions. When he thought his lip was well coated, he pulled back and rubbed his lips together, coating his top lip.

Louis stared at his reflection in the mirror. He admired the way the gloss made his lips look wet and shiny, delivering a subtle accentuation and just a hint of color. He opened his mouth softly, and then closed it again. The sticky feeling of the lip gloss was interesting and unique. He licked his lips, but quickly realized the taste of the gloss was not nearly as nice as the smell. He rubbed his lips together again. He was quite pleased with the result.

Louis made a kissy-face at himself in the mirror, and then smirked at himself for making silly faces. He brought his hand up to his mouth, and kissed the back of it, delivering a quick peck to the soft skin. The gloss had left a lip-shaped pink spot on his pale skin. He smiled to himself. Maybe there wasn’t anything wrong with this. Maybe it was just a bit of fun. Maybe he had been over-thinking it.

With a boost of confidence and courage, Louis picked up the nail polish. He held the glass bottle against his hand, splaying his fingers. He was still in love with the mint green color, and could think of a particular flannel shirt of Harry’s that had the same color in it.

He wondered how difficult it would be to paint his own nails. He unscrewed the white cap and pulled the little brush out of the bottle, wiping the excess liquid on the bottle’s rim as he had seen Perrie do.

He gazed at the fingernails of his left hand, before deciding to simply go for it. He figured he had already come this far. Louis decided he would paint his nails and then take it off before Harry got home this afternoon.

Louis’ hand was shaking as he brought the little brush to his left thumbnail. He slowly swiped the color over his nail, as delicately as he could, although Louis was not a particularly delicate person. He quickly realized that he had used too much, and the polish was getting all over cuticle and the skin around his nail.

Louis drew back and frowned at his work. It looked nothing like the precise job Perrie had done. But Louis had also never been a perfectionist, and he decided to move on to the other fingers. He painted the other four fingers on his left hand, using less polish now but still making a mess of his fingers.

Louis crinkled his nose at the very imperfect paint job. He thought his nails looked like they had been painted by a five year old. He decided to move onto his right hand, but quickly realized that would be even more difficult. His hand shook as he tried as hard as he could to keep the polish to his fingernails, but it was even harder than the first round. Louis scowled at the mess he had made.

He thought it looked pretty bad. He hadn’t realized how difficult this was. Louis tried not to get upset with himself. He knew it would take time to get it right. He blew on his fingers, hoping it would dry quickly.

Louis held his right hand to his chest, observing in the mirror how the mint green looked on his nails. It was soft, softer than the blue color Perrie had painted on his nails. Even though it was a mess, Louis liked it. He thought the delicate color suited him.

Louis reached for the mascara next, keeping his fingers splayed, moving delicately and slowly. He unscrewed the lid and pulled out the feathery wand. He examined it, wondering how hard it would be to keep from poking himself in the eye. Louis pressed his hips against the counter again, leaning far forwards to get a look at his eyelashes.

He brought the mascara wand up to his eyelashes and very delicately brushed the dark color over just the ends of the lashes, too worried to go further back in fear of poking himself in the eye. He repeated the motions on his other eye and then drew back. He admired himself in the mirror for a moment. He thought it looked good, but was too subtle.

Louis leaned in and tried again, going deeper into the lash now, being more bold. He covered his lashes with several swipes of the wand. He admired himself again. The mascara had transformed his eyes, defining the shape and making them stand out. He even thought it made his eyes look more blue.

Louis tilted his head, still staring at himself in the mirror. He thought he looked lovely. The dark mascara on his lashes accentuated his eyes in a beautiful way. His lashes looked longer and more defined. Louis batted his eyes at himself in the mirror, noticing the way his eyelashes looked wonderfully thick and feathery with the makeup. He noticed that the makeup gave his face a more delicate, feminine look. It wasn’t just pretty, he thought, but it was also sexy and alluring. The eye makeup gave Louis’ eyes a fascinatingly glamorous look.

He was freshly shaven and noticed that he looked younger, in a pleasant way. Everyone had always told him he had delicate features, and Louis could see it now, and he quite liked it. He observed the smoothness of his cheeks, and his pale skin. He wondered for a moment how some blush would look, subtly coloring his cheeks. Louis shook his head at this thought, deciding this was enough for now.

He thought his nails might be dry enough by now to do a few tasks, so Louis made his way out of the bathroom and over to the closet he shared with Harry. He scanned through Harry’s clothes until he located the flannel shirt he had been looking for. He held his polished nails up to the fabric. He had been right, there was striping in the cotton that matched exactly with Louis’ nail color. The other colors were pretty dark blues and purples. Louis carefully grabbed it off the hanger and walked back to the bathroom.

Louis stood in front of the mirror and stripped his clothes off, careful not to brush his nails against any fabric. He then very delicately put on Harry’s flannel, keeping it unbuttoned. Louis stood back when he was done, admiring himself in the large mirror.

Louis loved how big the shirt was on him. He thought it made him look delicate and small. Louis slowly brought his hands up to his chest, holding his palms against the shirt, fingers splayed. He loved the coordinating colors. He rubbed his lips together again, smacking them loudly and then snickering at himself.

Louis pictured Harry looking at him like this. The thought of Harry staring at him with lust in his eyes while Louis was looking pretty like this gave Louis the shivers. He wondered what Harry would think, if he would be okay with it. Louis hadn’t planned on telling Harry about all of this, but now that he was dolled up and liking the way he looked, he wondered if it would be so bad.

Louis pictured Harry calling him pretty. He could hear Harry’s deep voice in his head, hear Harry’s words of praise. Louis felt himself getting hard just thinking about it. Louis closed his eyes and pictured Harry’s hands on him, running them all over Louis’ body. He pictured Harry kissing his pink wet lips, some of the gloss transferring to Harry’s lips from the kiss. Harry would say things like ‘you’re so pretty, baby,’ and ‘my beautiful Louis.’

Louis slowly brought his hand to his cock, delicately wrapping his hand around it, and beginning to stroke. He put his left hand against the counter, leaning his weight on it as he tugged at himself with his right hand.

Louis opened his eyes so he could admire his lovely green fingernails and the way they looked next to his cock. He stroked harder and faster now, still imagining Harry’s hands and Harry’s voice and his gentle words of love and admiration.

Louis had never realized it before, but in this moment all he wanted was to be pretty and delicate, and for Harry to see him that way. He wanted Harry to make love to him, tenderly and lovingly, while Louis wore his mascara and his pretty lip gloss. Louis could run his hands over Harry and admire the green color against Harry’s skin as well.

Just as Louis was working himself up to climax, he heard the sudden rumble of the garage door opening one story below. Louis’ heart dropped and he froze. He hadn’t expected Harry home for hours.

Louis jumped into action, scrambling for a moment to figure out what to do. He slammed the bathroom door closed and fumbled to find the nail polish remover. But he stopped for a moment, considering maybe it would be more important to take off the mascara and lip gloss first.

Louis whipped around and turned on the shower, praying that Harry wouldn’t come into the bathroom if he thought Louis was in the shower, although knowing that had never stopped him before.

Louis located the cotton balls and opened the nail polish remover, saturating three at once and spilling plenty of it all over the vanity-top. He swiped furiously at his fingernails. Luckily the polish wasn’t yet fully hard and came off easily.

Louis listened for Harry’s footsteps as he finished off both hands. He gave his nails a once-over before scooping up all the cotton balls, now wet and streaked with mint-green, and threw them into the trash can. He then grabbed the lip gloss, mascara, and nail polish and threw them messily back into the drawer then had been hidden in.

Louis scanned the counter-top, making sure all the makeup and any evidence of it was gone. He then jumped into the shower, knowing the other face makeup would come off in the water. Louis stood under the water and vigorously scrubbed his face. He grabbed the grapefruit body wash from the shower shelf and squeezed it into his hands. He rubbed his eyes roughly with it, hoping the mascara would come off easily with soap and water.

After he figured he was in the clear, Louis turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. He walked to the fogged-up mirror and rubbed a clear spot so he could look at himself.

He was back to normal. The makeup was gone. His eyes were no longer dark and intriguing, his lips no longer shiny and enticing. He frowned at himself. The makeup hadn’t been there for long, but Louis was already disappointed that it was gone.

Louis could hear Harry’s footfalls downstairs. He stared at himself in the mirror. He wasn’t pretty any more. Hearing Harry’s presence in the house pulled Louis back to reality. He questioned himself. He knew this was not normal. Louis scoffed at himself for thinking Harry could be okay with this. There was no way Harry could be okay with this.

The thought brought tears to Louis’ eyes. He questioned all of it. Why did he need this so badly? Why did he need it at all? It was ridiculous and abnormal, and something to be laughed at. Louis pictured the disgusted face Harry would have if he ever found out.

Louis shook his head, trying to snap himself out of it. The only thing he knew right now was that he could not tell anyone, not even Harry. He knew he had to keep this a secret.

 

~

 

When Harry found the used cotton balls in the bathroom garbage can, he didn’t know what he was seeing at first. He reached into the bin, pushing aside a few tissues that Louis had clearly shoved on top to try to hide the evidence. An easy guess told Harry the mint green color he was seeing was nail polish. An even easier search and Harry found the nail polish, along with the mascara and lip gloss. They were shoved carelessly into a drawer that had mostly Louis’ stuff in it.

Harry realized quickly that the items were clearly out of their packaging and had most likely been used. His mind began to race. He assumed it had been less than a week since Louis had bought these things, as it had clearly been the nail-painting episode that had triggered whatever this was.

And he wondered what this was, exactly. It hadn’t escaped Harry’s attention how much Louis had enjoyed the nail polish. Louis had been incredibly taken with the way it looked on him; he hadn’t been able to stop glancing at his fingernails. Harry thought about that night, and what Louis had asked of him in bed.

It had been a different experience, to say the least. Louis had never before asked Harry to call him pretty. But the effect of the nail polish had clearly elicited something in Louis. Harry could tell it was most likely something Louis had never expected or experienced.

And now he was buying makeup, and most likely using it. It wasn’t just that, but Louis was hiding it as well. Harry was not sure what to think. He didn’t know what it meant.

Above all, he was saddened by the thought that Louis hadn’t told him about it. Harry realized that Louis must be embarrassed or ashamed, or in the very least, quite confused. Did Louis think that Harry wouldn’t like it? Or did Louis think there was a chance that Harry might even ridicule him for it? Harry’s heart broke at the thought. He hated the idea of Louis feeling insecure about something like this, and even perhaps deciding that Harry would be turned off by it.

Harry stood in the bathroom thinking. What _did_ he think about it? Harry pondered the thought of Louis wearing mascara and lip gloss. He wondered how far it would go, and what would be next. How deep did this go with Louis? What did it mean exactly? He supposed those were thing only Louis could answer.

Harry wondered if he would be okay with Louis wearing not just nail polish, but actual face makeup. He frowned. He couldn’t come to a conclusion either way.

But the one thing Harry could note was that he was not turned off by the idea. Not at all. In fact, he found himself feeling curious. He was interested now. The revelation had sparked his curiosity.

But harry was not sure where to take this. He thought perhaps it was something Louis simply didn’t want to tell Harry, ever. Perhaps it was something Louis wanted to experience on his own.

However, the memory of that night after the visit with Zayn and Perrie was fresh in Harry’s mind. Louis had specifically asked things of Harry. He had asked Harry to be gentle and sweet with him. He had been submissive. He had asked Harry to praise him and call him pretty.

Harry pondered these ideas. Yes, this was something Louis wanted, and it involved Harry.

 

~

 

Harry had absolutely no idea how to approach the topic with Louis. He usually knew what kind of headspace Louis was in about things, or could at least make a prediction. But in this case, Harry had no clue.

Although he had his ideas, Harry wasn’t even entirely sure why Louis hadn’t told Harry in the first place about the makeup, even before buying it.

He decided to approach the topic delicately but honestly. He waited until bed time that night so there would be plenty of time to talk.

 

Louis was in bed playing on his phone. Harry got in next to him and moved in close, placing his hand on Louis’ thigh.

“Whatchya doin’, babe?” Harry asked, watching Louis.

“Just on Twitter for a bit,” Louis responded, not taking his eyes from his phone. Harry knew he had to just rip off the band-aid.

“So Louis, I… I wanted to talk to you about something,” Harry began. He had no idea why, but he was apprehensive. He moved his hand from Louis’ thigh and began playing with his rings, twisting them nervously.

“Yeah?” Louis responded, lowering his phone and looking to Harry tentatively.

“I noticed the, um… the cotton balls in the bathroom garbage can today. It looked like… like there was nail polish on them?” Harry said softly, phrasing the last part as a question.

Louis felt his cheeks flush bright red and his heart began beating wildly. He had no idea what to say. He cursed himself for not properly hiding the cotton balls underneath the other garbage. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Harry, and instead dropped his head and began nervously toying at the bedspread.

“It’s okay!” Harry rushed to say, observing Louis’ reaction. “Really, babe, if you’re into that, it’s fine-”

“I’m not into it!” Louis interrupted, uselessly defending himself. He knew it was pointless, and hated lying to Harry, but Louis could not bring himself to admit what he was doing.

“Babe, I saw the-” Harry began again.

“It was stupid! It was just a one-time, stupid thing, really!” Louis tried to explain, “Really, there’s no point in talking about it, because it’s done. It’s nothing. It means nothing!” Louis demanded, speaking quickly, panic rising in his voice as his gaze darted around the room, looking anywhere but at Harry.

Harry had been about to say that he had found the other cosmetics, and that he knew it wasn’t just the nail polish, but Louis wasn’t letting him even have a conversation about it.

“It’s not… it’s not stupid,” Harry tried, his face screwed up with confusion. Clearly Louis did not want to talk about this, but that bothered Harry. He didn’t want Louis thinking it was stupid or wrong in some way.

“No, it was. It is. But it was just the one time, really,” Louis said, knowing he was going deeper into the lie, but not able to admit the truth. “Listen, Harry. It’s nothing. It means nothing.” Harry shook his head in uncertainty.

“Louis… it’s not a big deal. We can talk about it,” Harry tried to reason. But Louis wasn’t having it.

“There’s nothing to talk about!” Louis replied quickly, his voice getting louder now. He squirmed to the edge of the bed, away from Harry.

“But there is, babe. I mean… you obviously like it,” Harry said, trying hard to keep his voice calm. But that was the last straw for Louis. He felt like he could not handle this anymore. His cheeks were bright red and he was trembling. His throat was tight. He felt like he was seconds from bursting into tears.

“I don’t like it!” he yelled, jumping up off the bed now.

“Louis!” Harry said incredulously, “It’s okay! It’s okay to like it. I mean, that night after we got home from Zayn and Perrie’s house-”

“That was nothing! Jesus, Harry! Just drop it for fuck’s sake!” Louis demanded. But it made no difference; he ended the conversation by storming out of the room.

 

Louis rushed out as quickly as he could, racing down the stairs and into the kitchen. He debated leaving the house. He couldn’t stand the thought of Harry trying to continue the conversation.

Louis stood in the kitchen, breathing heavily. He knew he couldn’t leave. He had nowhere to go, and he was only wearing boxer shorts and a t-shirt. He leaned both hands against the kitchen counter and dropped his head. His heart was still racing. He felt like he couldn’t think straight. This was all too much. Harry wasn’t supposed to find out about this, at least not until Louis felt like he had wrapped his own mind around the idea and been able to make sense of all of it.

He tried to breathe deeply. Thankfully Harry hadn’t followed him down the stairs. His mind was racing. He hadn’t expected this.

Louis realized quickly that he was not angry with Harry. He was angry with himself.

“Fucking idiot,” Louis berated himself. He shook his head in disgust. He wondered how he could be so stupid. This whole thing was completely ridiculous, and he hated that it had come to this. He hated that he needed something so absurd and inappropriate.

He made a promise to himself to never again do what he had done that morning.

 

Louis slept on the couch that night.

The next morning, when Harry had left for his morning workout, Louis grabbed his makeup out of the drawer it was stashed in. He hurried downstairs, the three items clenched tight in his fist. Louis unceremoniously threw the mascara, the lip gloss, and the lovely green nail polish into the garbage.

He then wrenched the garbage bag out of the bin and tied the bag up tight, double knotting the draw strings. He marched the bag out to the street and tossed it roughly into the large garbage pail.

Louis walked back inside and flopped his body roughly down on the couch. He felt utterly spent, and somewhat empty. He clenched his jaw, trying to fight back a well of emotions.

It was done.

 

~

 

Harry could barely pay attention to his trainer all morning. His mind was completely saturated with thoughts of Louis and their fight the night before. He couldn’t help wondering if he had done the wrong thing, if he shouldn’t have said anything at all. And Louis hadn’t come to bed that night. Harry couldn’t remember the last time Louis hadn’t come to bed.

However, above all that, Harry worried if Louis was okay. Harry knew that they would be okay, that they would work it out in time, and be back to normal. But he wondered about Louis. Clearly he wanted or needed something that he was too embarrassed to ask for, or even talk about.

Harry spent the entire morning worrying. It broke his heart that Louis felt that he couldn’t talk to him about this. But on top of that, Harry more than anything simply wanted Louis to be okay with himself, with all parts of himself. He hated the idea that Louis would be ashamed or embarrassed about something he wanted, or something that was maybe even a part of him.

Harry had already made the decision about his role in all of this, and it had been an easy decision. He realized he didn’t care, that he didn’t find it strange, and that he would do whatever Louis wanted. He would participate as much as he could, or as much as Louis wanted, and he would even encourage Louis. It didn’t matter to Harry what Louis was into, as long as he was happy. He wanted nothing more than for Louis to be happy.

Harry wondered to himself what he could do to make Louis comfortable, and to allow Louis to see that he was okay with everything. Simply saying it wouldn’t be enough, he knew he had to make a gesture.

When the idea hit Harry, it was literally like a light bulb flicking on. It was perfect. He could buy Louis things, all sorts of things. Harry found himself grinning goofily to himself as he thought of the idea.

As he completed a cycle of pull-ups, Harry’s mind raced with all the possibilities of things he could buy for Louis. Yes, there was nail polish and mascara, but there were multitudes of other things. Even things they could share. Harry thought back to the pink-grapefruit body wash. It made sense now. That was something Louis had bought to test the waters. And Harry could buy more of it. He could buy perfumes and lotions for Louis, as well as bubble bath or bath salts.

He smiled again, picturing Louis rubbing on delicious smelling body lotion. Or perhaps Harry could be the one to rub it on Louis. And he would buy Louis any kind of makeup he wanted. Harry pictured Louis wearing the mascara and lip gloss he knew Louis had. But there were all sorts of other things. Harry bit his lip as he pictured Louis’ beautiful blue eyes accentuated with some eyeliner or eye shadow. He suddenly couldn’t wait to be done at the gym.

 

Harry didn’t care that he was a sweaty mess. He was way too excited to worry about his body odor. He simply couldn’t wait to get to the store to buy things for his Louis.

And he wanted to spare no expense. At Debenhams he picked out some of the best eye makeups, according to the sales lady, as well as a special sweet-smelling perfume that came in a pretty pink bottle with a cap shaped like a flower. He also bought a pot of blush in a very light pink shade that had a slight shimmer to it, and two shades of lip gloss.

On his way home, Harry stopped at a pharmacy and bought bubble bath, as well as two different body lotions: one that smelled like vanilla, and one that smelled like pomegranate. The pomegranate was pink in color, with a shimmer to it, and the vanilla was more gender-neutral, a cream color and not sparkly at all. He couldn’t choose, so decided to get both. He also noticed a lavender-scented candle and decided to add that to the purchases as well. At the back of the store Harry found the gift-wrap section. He picked out a silver gift bag and a pack of pink tissue paper.

Harry found the nail polish section next. He spent a good ten minutes gazing at all of the colors. The choices seemed endless. It was overwhelming. He wondered how Louis had picked out just one. Harry eventually settled on a dark plum-purple. He knew Louis had enjoyed the dark blue, so he reasoned that dark purple was a decent bet.

Harry realized that he had been grinning the entire time. He was having fun. Not only that, but he loved the idea of giving all of these things to Louis. Of showing Louis how much he loved him, and how he couldn’t care less about any of the stereotypes that told Louis he couldn’t have what he wanted.

On his way out of the store, Harry noticed there was a small section of the store with a selection of makeup bags. Harry thought that might be a nice addition to everything he had bought so far. He scanned the shelves and sure enough there was one that looked absolutely perfect for Louis. It was black with little gold skulls on it, and was the perfect size. It was not feminine, but rather pretty in a sweet way.

When Harry got back into his car, he laid out all his purchases on the passenger seat. He took the paper stuffing out of the cosmetics bag and put all of the makeup inside: eyeliner, blush, and lip gloss, as well as the purple nail polish. The wrapped it in the tissue paper and placed it gingerly into the silver gift bag. He then added the body lotion and perfume, and stuffed several more pieces of tissue paper into the bag.

It looked perfect. Harry hoped with all his heart that Louis would like the things Harry had bought for him.

Thinking of Louis’ reaction pulled Harry back to reality. He grabbed his phone and typed out a quick text message to Louis.

_You home, babe?_

Harry had left that morning for his workout before Louis had woken up. They hadn’t talked about the night before. Louis’ response was vague and impassive.

_No. Out for afternoon._

Harry had assumed Louis would still be upset from the night before. It didn’t bother Harry. He understood it. He could only hope that his gift would be exactly what Louis needed.

 

~

 

Harry fidgeted nervously all afternoon. He tried to busy himself with housework, unable to keep still, but his mind wasn’t even focused enough to complete any real tasks.

Harry had placed the bubble bath and candle on the edge of their large tub, hoping desperately that Louis would be up for a bath later. He put the silver gift bag, full with Louis’ presents, right on the kitchen island where Louis couldn’t miss it. Harry had carefully fluffed the pink tissue paper so it was popping out the top of the bag. Harry was quite impressed with his wrapping skills.

There was nothing left to do but wait. Louis had texted him saying he would be home after dinner, so Harry ate by himself. His nerves were building with each passing hour. The longer he waited, the more he doubted himself. He wondered if it was ridiculous, buying all this stuff for Louis. He wondered if had just gotten overexcited, and if he was simply digging himself even further into a hole.

Finally, a little after eight o’clock, Harry heard Louis’ car pulling into the driveway. Harry was seated at the kitchen table. He gripped the table with both hands, his knuckles going white.

Louis entered the house from the garage, which after the mud room led right into the kitchen. Harry could hear Louis taking off his shoes and coat in the mud room. He took a deep breath.

“Hey, babe,” Harry greeted Louis, loud enough that he could hear him in the next room.

“Hey,” Louis said, his voice sounding weary, as he appeared in the kitchen.

“How was your day?” Harry asked as he stood from his chair at the table.

“Fine,” Louis responded, emotionless. “Spent some time with Olly.” He seemed to notice the bag on the island as he threw his keys and wallet on the kitchen counter. Harry decided to acknowledge it right away.

“I… I bought you something,” he said softly, taking a few steps towards Louis.

“Yeah?” Louis asked, giving Harry and then the bag a suspicious but curious glance.

“Yeah, I… I went to Debenhams today, and then to the pharmacy…” Harry continued, moving closer to the island. Louis sucked his bottom lip into his mouth.

“Okay…” he replied hesitantly.

“I just thought… thought you might like some of this stuff?” Harry said nervously. Louis was staring at the bag and chewing on his lip. There was an awkward pause.

Harry walked up to Louis and gently clasped his hand. “You can open it,” he said softly, pulling Louis over to the island.

“What is it?” Louis asked, unsure of what else to say.

“Just open it,” Harry instructed as they reached the island. He reached out and pushed the bag over to Louis.

Louis paused for just a moment before reaching out and ever-so-gently brushing his fingertips over the wispy pink tissue paper. His face suddenly softened.

“I like the wrapping,” he said quietly.

“Thank you,” Harry replied. Louis waited another moment, as though he knew what he would find and needed to prepare himself. “It’s okay, babe. Just open it,” Harry urged. He took another step closer to Louis and placed a tender hand on the small of his back.

Louis moved slowly, gingerly removing the tufts of tissue paper from the bag and tossing them aside. He peered into the bag.

Harry thought he caught a very quick flash of a smile on Louis’ face before it turned into consternation. “What is this?” he asked hesitantly.

“Just some special things for my special Louis,” Harry responded tenderly. He moved right up behind Louis, and rested his chin on Louis’ shoulder, his hand still at the small of Louis’ back.

Louis very slowly reached into the bag, his hand shaking, and pulled out the perfume. His breath caught in his throat. “You bought this… for… for me?” he asked. Harry nodded, his chin still against Louis’ shoulder. “Kind of girly,” Louis observed quietly, running the pad of his thumb over the grooves in the flower-shaped cap.

“I thought you’d like it that way,” Harry responded affectionately, giving Louis’ waist a gentle squeeze. Louis’ cheeks went pink as he smiled.

Louis reached into the bag again, more eagerly now. He pulled out both lotions, now beginning to smile. “Harry, this is…” he tried to say, but his voice caught in his throat again, and he couldn’t think of the words he wanted. “These are for me?” he decided to ask, still unsure of what exactly was happening.

“Yes, of course,” Harry said, giggling to himself. “I hope you like the smells.” Louis quickly popped open the cap on the vanilla-scented lotion and brought it up to his nose. The smell was heavenly.

“Mmm, it’s delicious,” he cooed. “Smell,” he instructed Harry, holding the bottle up to his shoulder for Harry to smell.

“I love it,” Harry said. Louis did the same with the pomegranate, biting his lip and smiling. “There’s a bit more,” Harry whispered, nodding back to the bag.

Louis moved excitedly now, pulling the tissue-paper wrapped makeup case out of the gift bag. He unwrapped it slowly though, taking his time. When he saw it he smiled curiously, cocking his head to the side.

“There’s things inside,” Harry clarified. Louis grasped the zipper and unzipped the case. He took a shallow, halted breath as he peered inside.

“Harry…” he breathed. He had to blink a few times to be sure of what he was seeing.

“Anything you don’t want, we can take back. As long as it’s unopened,” Harry said quickly, noticing Louis’ pause.

Louis very slowly turned the bag on its side and dumped its contents out on the counter, using his other hand to block the items from falling out too quickly.

He stared. It was overwhelming. Louis wasn’t sure what to think.

“I hope its okay. I… I wasn’t sure what to get… so I just tried to get a variety,” Harry explained, watching Louis’ face closely. His expression was hard to read.

Louis just looked at the different items, without touching. He seemed to be unsure of what to do. Harry moved a hand to Louis’ waist and began to slowly rub up and down his side.

“I know it’s a lot,” Harry said softly, “But I just want you to have… everything you want.” Louis was silent. He looked confused, as though fighting with himself. “I just wanted you to know that it’s okay. That I’m okay with all of this,” Harry continued, unsure of what Louis was thinking.

Louis nodded ever-so-slightly. They were silent for another moment, Harry standing behind Louis, still resting on his shoulder, one hand at Louis’ waist, the other braced on the counter.

“You okay, babe?” Harry asked finally. Louis didn’t respond, but instead slowly reached out a hand and picked up the purple nail polish. He gazed at it. “Is the color okay?” Harry asked.

Louis was surprised and overcome with emotion. He had never expected Harry to not only be so supportive, but to actually buy things for him. It was overwhelming. Louis put down the nail polish and brought his other hand up to his mouth. He squeezed his eyes shut as his face contorted. He nodded again, taking another halted breath, as tears welled up in his eyes.

“Aw, babe. It’s okay. Come here,” Harry said quickly, grasping Louis and turning him so they were facing one another. He pulled Louis in, and Louis let him, burying his face in Harry’s neck and letting out a small sob. “It’s okay, Louis. It’s okay,” Harry consoled. He hugged Louis tightly, pressing their bodies together.

Louis cried into Harry’s neck and fisted his hands into Harry’s shirt.

“Is it the wrong thing? Is it too much?” Harry asked, desperate to know why Louis was reacting this way.

Louis shook his head aggressively. “No, no,” he tried to say through his tears. Harry pressed kisses into Louis’ hair.

“Then why the tears, baby?” he inquired softly, “It’s just… overwhelming?” he asked, trying to guess as Louis’ emotional state.

Louis nodded his head again. “I just didn’t… I just didn’t know I wanted it so much,” he tried to explain through his tears and halted breaths.

Harry held him for a few minutes, letting all the emotions pass. After a little while, Harry moved his body away from Louis a bit, holding Louis by the shoulders. “Let’s sit,” he said, pulling out one of the stools at the kitchen island for Louis. Louis sat, rubbing at his eyes with his hands.

Harry sat at his own stool, pressing up next to Louis, his hand around Louis’ waist again. After a moment, Louis reached out and began to toy with the items on the counter. He pulled them close and lined them up in front of himself, turning them all upright, their labels facing him. He studied them, running his fingers over the labels and then picking up each thing individually, studying the shape and the colors. He couldn’t believe all of this was his. Harry watched him.

“Did I do good?” Harry asked. Louis nodded again.

“You didn’t have to do this,” he spoke softly.

“I know. But I wanted to. I wanted to for you,” Harry said. “For my pretty Louis,” he added, whispering now as he leaned closer into Louis. Louis’ felt himself blush deeply. He turned his head and pressed his face against Harry’s shoulder. Harry smiled and kissed the top of Louis’ head. “I love you. And I would do anything for you.”

“I love you too,” Louis mumbled shyly into Harry’s shoulder. Harry took a deep, steadying breath. He clutched Louis tightly.

“I was thinking…” Harry began, plucking up his courage, “that maybe you’d want to use some of this stuff. Tonight. And maybe we could play a little.” Harry pressed his face into the top of Louis’ head as he said this. Louis pulled back and looked at Harry now, his eyes still wet with tears.

“You’d do that… for me?” he asked, his voice breaking slightly. He still could not believe that all this was happening.

“Of course, babe. I would do anything for you,” Harry confirmed, delivering another kiss into Louis’ hair.

But Louis suddenly looked concerned. “I don’t know if… if I’m ready to… to show you,” he whispered, pushing his face back into Harry’s shoulder. Harry hugged Louis even tighter.

“It’s okay, baby. Whatever you’re comfortable with,” he made clear. “But I was thinking we could start with a bath, just to ease into it. We can take it slow,” Harry explained. He had thought about this. He knew the whole thing would be a learning process for both of them.

Louis thought about it for a moment. He was still getting used to this. “Okay,” he finally whispered in agreement.

“Now?” Harry asked. Louis nodded.

Harry carefully scooped up Louis’ new makeup and put it back into the little case. “You take this, babe,” Harry instructed, handing the case to Louis. He then grasped the two lotions and perfume in one hand, between fingers, and grasped Louis’ free hand in his own.

Harry guided Louis slowly up the stairs, through the master bedroom, and into their large bathroom. Harry carefully placed the items down on the counter, and then took the makeup case from Louis and put it down next to the other things.

Harry then moved over to the large tub and turned on the faucet. “I bought this for us too,” he said, showing Louis the bubble bath. Harry added a generous amount of it into the flowing water. He then turned back to Louis.

Louis was standing, watching Harry, his legs pressed together, his hands folded in front of him, his cheeks still flushed pink. Harry smiled, his heart swelling for his beautiful Louis. He felt like he had never been so in love.

 

When the bath was ready, the temperature perfect and the tub overflowing with bubbles, Harry guided Louis into the water, holding his hand. He then climbed in behind Louis, straddling him, Louis’ back to Harry’s chest.

Harry gently grasped Louis’ shoulders and pulled him backwards so he was resting against Harry, Harry leaning back against the tub. Louis let out a soft sigh as he rested his head on Harry. Harry had his arms wrapped around Louis, holding him tight. It was warm and comfortable and quiet.

Harry could feel Louis melting into him, going calm and hushed. It was exactly what he wanted. He wanted to help get Louis into the proper headspace for later. He knew it would be hard for Louis to let Harry see him with the makeup on. It required a unique type of vulnerability.

After several minutes of quiet, Harry had an idea. “Want me to wash your hair, baby?” he asked Louis.

“Okay,” Louis agreed, speaking softly. Harry adjusted their position, pushing Louis gently forward as they sat up, Harry keeping his legs still on either side of Louis. He pushed some bubbles aside and scooped water into his hands.

“Tilt your head back, babe,” Harry instructed. Louis closed his eyes and tilted his head back. Harry wet Louis’ hair and then got to work washing it.

“You’re so pretty, baby,” Harry cooed as he slowly massaged shampoo into Louis’ scalp. “You’re gonna look so sexy for me, with all your pretty makeup on.” Louis couldn’t help blushing again. He squirmed a little, but kept his eyes closed as he listened to Harry.

“And you’ll smell so pretty for me. You’ll be so beautiful. I can’t wait to see you with your nails painted. And you can wear your lip gloss if you want. Your lips will look so beautiful. I’m not going to be able to stop kissing you,” Harry said, speaking slowly. He began to rinse the shampoo out of Louis’ hair with great care. He could feel Louis letting go bit by bit. “And you can put on your lovely smelling lotion. Or I can rub it on for you. Your skin will be so soft. I won’t be able to stop touching you. I won’t be able to keep my hands off you,” Harry continued. He ran his hands slowly up and down Louis’ arms now, and nuzzled his neck. He could feel Louis squirm again.

“H-Harry,” Louis whimpered.

“What is it, babe?” Harry asked as he leaned in and pressed kisses into the groove where Louis’ shoulders meet his neck.

“I’m… I’m sort of hard,” Louis whispered, sounding shy, almost embarrassed.

“That’s okay, babe,” Harry assured him, “You want me to take care of you now?”

“No, not yet,” Louis replied, fidgeting a little more.

“Come here,” Harry said as he wrapped his arms around Louis again and grasped both his hands. Harry shifted his weight and slowly stood up, pulling Louis up with him. He let go of Louis and stepped out of the tub, and then reached back to grab one of Louis’ hands and help him out as well.

Harry grabbed a clean towel and began to dry Louis off, and Louis let him. Harry ran the towel up and down Louis’ arms and legs, squeezed out his hair, and even ran the towel between his legs, although didn’t linger there.

He wrapped the towel around Louis’ waist and tucked it in place. The towel tented out slightly from Louis’ half-hard erection, but Harry ignored it for now. He dried himself off quickly with a new towel.

“Sit, babe,” Harry instructed as he positioned Louis down on the edge of the tub. It was the perfect height for him to sit comfortably. “Do you want the lotion now?” Harry asked. Louis nodded. “And your headband?” Harry inquired.

“Yeah,” Louis said softly. He was looking down at the floor.

Harry grabbed Louis’ black cotton headband from its drawer. “Which smell, baby? Pomegranate or vanilla?”

Louis thought for a moment. “Pomegranate,” he decided. Harry grabbed the pomegranate lotion, noting that Louis had chosen the pink option. He moved over to Louis at the edge of the tub. Louis squeezed his eyes shut as Harry held the headband stretched between his thumbs and index fingers and pulled it down over Louis’ head, and then pushed it back into the proper position.

Louis opened his eyes and blinked up at Harry. Harry smiled down at him. “I love you, baby,” Harry said as he leaned down and kissed Louis softly on the lips.

 

Harry then got on his knees in front of Louis. He opened the body lotion and squeezed a generous amount into his hands, rubbing them together. “Hold out your arms, babe,” Harry said. Louis held his arms forward and Harry ran his hands down them, from shoulder all the way down to his wrists, and back up again, trying to spread the lotion evenly. “Smells good. Good choice,” he said softly to Louis.

Harry then concentrated on one arm at a time, massaging the lotion into Louis’ warm skin. He moved down to Louis’ hands, massaging them with his thumbs. Louis was in a soft place, letting Harry hold him and touch him and take the lead. He felt himself becoming quieter and more relaxed the more Harry touched him and loved him and took care of him.

Harry then pumped more lotion into this hands and moved to Louis’ legs. He pushed Louis’ legs open gently and opened the towel so he could access his full leg. Harry massaged the sweet-smelling lotion into Louis’ feet, then his calves, then his thighs. He moved from one leg to the other without touching Louis’ dick.

He made sure it was all rubbed in well, massaging in gentle circles. Louis let out soft moans every once in a while, but was generally quiet, just taking it all in.

When Harry was done he stood up and took a step forward so he was standing between Louis’ legs. He brought one hand to Louis’ chin and lifted his head. “What do you want now, baby?” he asked gently. Louis’ cheeks flushed again and he looked away shyly. Harry smiled. “Want me to decide?” he asked, realizing that Louis was happy letting Harry take the lead. Louis nodded. “How about I paint your nails, hmm?” Harry asked. Louis looked back to Harry eagerly.

“O-okay,” he stammered, clearly excited at the idea. Harry turned and walked back to the sink to retrieve the nail polish.

“Purple? Or do you want your green color?” Harry asked. Louis didn’t want to tell Harry that the green color was out at the street in the garbage right now. But he was more than happy with purple either way.

“Purple,” he said, cheeks still pink.

“How about we move to the bed?” Harry asked, holding out a hand for Louis to grasp. Louis held his hand as Harry guided them through to the bedroom and over to the bed. “Are you happy with the towel, or do want your pants on?” he asked. He was getting used to this, to asking Louis what he wanted, to guiding Louis but letting him make small decisions. It felt natural.

“Towel is okay,” Louis said. Harry pulled Louis to the bed and situated them in the center, cross-legged and facing one another, their knees touching.

Harry guided Louis’ hands to his knees, which were covered by the large towel, and arranged his fingers so they were splayed and resting on the towel. “This okay, baby?” Harry asked as he shook the little vial of nail polish. He felt the need to check in with him, to make sure this was all okay, and that he was doing as Louis wanted. Above all, Harry needed to know that Louis was comfortable.

Louis nodded, giving Harry the okay. “I’ve never done this before,” Harry said as he unscrewed the cap, “So bear with me. I’ll try to be as neat as possible.”

“It’s okay. You’ll be great. Better than I could do,” Louis said softly. He was determined to sit perfectly still.

Harry brought the little brush to Louis’ left pinky fingernail. He very gingerly swiped it over the small fingernail, sweeping the color across in delicate strokes. Louis couldn’t help but smile. Harry was taking his time to be incredibly precise. And he loved the color.

Harry moved much slower than Perrie or Louis had, but was doing quite a good job. It wasn’t quite as perfect as Perrie’s job, and there were a few purple spots on Louis’ cuticles, but overall it was much better than Louis had done for himself.

Harry painted all ten nails with two coats each. The process had taken about thirty minutes, but it was worth it. Louis beamed when he saw how good of a job Harry had done, and how beautiful the color was.

“You like it?” Harry asked as he screwed the lid back on the bottle.

Louis could barely answer. He felt tears coming to his eyes again, and he didn’t even know why. He bit his bottom lip and nodded vigorously as he stared down at his fingernails, now a beautiful and shiny plum-purple.

Harry grinned at Louis’ reaction and leaned in to place a tender kiss to Louis’ lips. They kissed for a moment, languidly and with no hurry, before Louis pulled back to sniffle and wipe a tear from his eye.

“It’s still okay, yeah?” Harry asked softly, placing his hands on Louis’ wrists.

“Yes. Very, very okay,” Louis said shakily. They sat quietly for a moment, breathing softly together. Louis was still gazing down at his nails. Harry brushed his thumbs over Louis’ skin, soft and slow.

Harry knew what would come next. He wondered if Louis still wanted it. Harry felt nervous suddenly, but knew he had to offer. He knew Louis would be too timid to ask for it.

“Do you want to try some of that makeup now?” he asked delicately. Louis didn’t answer right away. He gazed at the ground and took a deep breath.

“Yes. Yes I guess so,” he said softly, “But I want you to be there with me.”

“Of course,” Harry agreed. He moved slowly off the bed and then grasped Louis by the wrist and pulled him along with him. He walked them back into the bathroom. “Do you want to sit on the counter, baby?” Harry asked. Louis nodded and moved to sit on the counter. Harry helped him hop up so he didn’t have to risk messing up his freshly painted nails. Harry stood directly in front of Louis and between his knees.

Harry reached for the little black makeup case. “What do you want to start with?” he asked.

“Can I see?” Louis said shyly, moving his head to peer into the case. Harry took out each item individually.

“There’s black eyeliner,” Harry said, pulling the thin pencil out of the case and showing Louis. “And also a few different shades of eye shadow.” He opened the container of eye shadow. There were small pats of shadow in shades of brown, gold, and blue. “The sales lady said these colors are good for blue eyes. To bring out blue eyes, I mean,” Harry explained as he showed Louis. Louis didn’t say anything, but just looked curiously as he chewed on his bottom lip.

“I also got you some blush. It’s a light color. So it would be subtle,” Harry explained as he pulled the pot of blush out of the bag. He pulled off the plastic wrapping and opened it to show Louis. “I think this pink would look so good on your cheeks,” Harry said, trying to sound confident, although part of him was still nervous that Louis wouldn’t like the things Harry had chosen.

“And lastly, there’s two kinds of lip gloss,” Harry said, placing the other things on the counter and pulling out the two tubes of gloss. One was a light pink, one was a dark pink. “These would look so pretty on your lips, baby.” Louis’ cheeks colored again. He suddenly felt hot.

“You don’t have to do this for me, Harry,” Louis said softly. Even though Harry was being so nice, and Louis really, really wanted this, he still felt ashamed. Harry put his hand under Louis’ chin again and tilted his head up. He wanted to look Louis in the eye.

“It’s for me, then,” Harry said, more confidence in his voice now. Louis couldn’t help but smile. His throat felt tight again. He couldn’t believe he had such an amazing boyfriend who was willing to put up with all his ridiculous needs. Louis knew what Harry had said was a lie, and that he himself was being selfish, wanting all this silly stuff. But he couldn’t help it. Now that it was in front of him like this, and Harry was offering, Louis felt like it was all he had ever wanted. He had such a beautiful selection of makeup now, and it was _his_ makeup. And Harry had bought it for him.

He slowly reached over and took the little pot of blush into his hand. He brought it closer to his face to examine the color.

“You want that to start?” Harry asked after a moment. Louis nodded and slowly handed it to Harry. There was a small brush under the color to apply it with. Harry took the brush and gently swept it in short strokes across the powdery pink blush. “Okay, I’m starting now,” he told Louis.

Louis nodded and then tilted his face slightly up and closed his eyes. Harry placed his left hand on Louis’ shoulder and then brought the little brush up to Louis’ face and delicately swept it across his cheekbones, alternating sides until the color was evenly spread and balanced. He leaned back to observe his work. Louis opened his eyes.

“How does it look?” he asked timidly. Harry smiled.

“Looks beautiful, babe,” Harry said, leaning in to give Louis a quick peck on the lips. Louis smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

Harry wasn’t lying. The color looked lovely against Louis’ skin, accentuating his cheekbones and bringing out the natural color of his skin.

“Okay, maybe some gloss next?” Harry asked, daring to be more bold now.

“Okay, yeah,” Louis agreed.

“Which one, darker or lighter?” Harry asked, holding up both gloss tubes. Louis considered them for a moment.

“That one,” he said, pointing to the lighter pink.

“Perfect,” Harry said, putting the other one down and again taking the plastic wrapping off the one Louis chose. Harry unscrewed the cap and pulled out the wand.

When Harry leaned into Louis, Louis wrapped his calves around the back of Harry’s legs. Harry smiled, and continued, carefully bringing the lip gloss wand up to Louis’ lips. Louis opened his mouth slightly.

Harry swept the sticky gloss across Louis’ bottom lip, coating it generously. “Okay, smudge your lips together,” Harry instructed. Louis did as he was told, coating his top lip as well. Harry leaned back again to observe his work. It looked perfect. The color of Louis’ lips now perfectly complemented his cheeks.

“It looks so pretty, baby,” Harry said softly. Louis smiled coyly as Harry gave him another peck on the lips. “Mm, sticky,” he said, laughing, and Louis laughed too.

“Eyes next,” Louis said, still nervous, but cautiously excited now.

“Okay, I may not be too good with the liner,” Harry warned as he pulled the plastic off the small eyeliner pencil.

“It’s okay,” Louis said as he watched Harry.

“Okay, close your eyes,” Harry instructed.

Harry held the pencil in his right hand and brought his left hand up and cupped Louis’ jaw to hold him still. Harry very delicately brought the pencil to Louis’ eyelid. He got as close as he could to Louis’ eyelash-line and swiped the tip of the pencil over his eyelid in short, quick strokes.

Louis smiled in spite of himself. “Feels funny,” he said, still trying to keep as still as possible.

Harry was biting his tongue, trying as hard as he could to concentrate and get the eyeliner line perfect across Louis’ lids. He took his time, adding layers of black, and blending with his thumb to erase the sharp line of it.

Harry pulled back when he thought he was done. He was pretty happy with his work.

“Can I open my eyes?” Louis asked.

“Go ahead,” Harry said. Louis fluttered his eyes open and looked at Harry. Harry was staring back at him with intensity.

“Is… is it… okay?” Louis asked nervously. Harry broke into a grin.

“Yes. Yes, baby, you look so sexy. Do you wanna see?” he asked.

“I guess,” Louis said as he began to turn his body to face the mirror. Harry moved out from between his legs so Louis could shift positions.

Louis turned slowly and looked into the mirror. He was surprised by the way he looked. He hadn’t known what to expect. Harry had done an amazing job. It wasn’t too much. Louis thought it was subtle yet sexy. He stared at himself.

Harry moved in close again. He put one hand on Louis’ back, and the other on Louis’ thigh where it was pressed against the counter top. “What do you think? Do you like it?” he asked.

Louis thought he could cry again, but he tried to hold back. He didn’t want to mess up the perfect work Harry had done. But the more he stared, the more he loved it. The eyeliner accentuated his eyes in the best way, making them look larger, and defining the shape. The blush looked perfect, swept across his sharp cheekbones, the color blending beautifully with his skin. It was just enough, not too much. And it matched the color of the lip gloss. His lips were shiny and wet looking. Louis pressed his lips together again, loving the sleek feel of the gloss.

“I… I love it,” Louis said, his voice breaking. Harry grinned broadly.

“Yay!” he cheered softly, leaning in to kiss Louis’ cheek. “Anything else? Eye shadow, or more of anything?”

“No. No this is perfect,” Louis said quietly. Louis turned back to Harry now, facing him again. He began to nervously toy with the bottom hem of Harry’s shirt. “Do you… do you like it?” he asked, not meeting Harry’s eye.

“I love it, baby. I think you look so sexy,” Harry replied, pulling Louis into a hug. Louis carefully pressed his face into Harry’s chest. He opened his legs again so Harry could stand between them, and hooked his calves once again around Harry’s legs.

“Call me pretty, Harry,” Louis said softly into Harry’s chest.

“Mm, you are, baby, so pretty. My pretty Louis,” Harry replied, rubbing his cheek into Louis’ hair and against the soft headband. “You look so sexy baby. So sexy for me. I love it so much. You’re so beautiful, Lou.”

Louis pressed his body closer to Harry, as close as he could, holding onto him tightly.

“Lemme see those pretty lips,” Harry asked as he pulled back. Louis tilted his head up and smiled, closed-mouthed, up at Harry. Harry leaned down for a kiss. He liked the feel of the smooth, sticky gloss against his own lips. He pressed in deeper, licking his tongue over Louis’ lips. Louis opened his mouth to the kiss. Their tongues slid against one another as they kissed deeply but slowly, moving together. Harry moved one hand up to cup Louis’ cheek as he licked into Louis.

Harry felt Louis wiggle against him, and felt his hardness through the towel. He moved both hands down to Louis’ bum and pulled his body in even closer. Louis tugged at Harry’s shirt, pulling him down to press even harder into the kiss.

Harry pulled back after a moment, feeling breathless. “Bed?” he breathed into Louis’ mouth. Louis nodded and wrapped his arms over Harry’s shoulders, an invitation for Harry to lift him up.

Harry did, gripping Louis’ bum with his large hands and lifting him up. Louis wrapped his legs around Harry’s hips as Harry pulled Louis up and off the counter.

He carried Louis to the bed, the towel dropping off Louis as Harry walked. He placed Louis down gently on the bed, and Louis wrapped his arms around himself and curled into himself, pressing his legs together and resting his heels on the bed frame.

With Louis’ hands clutching himself, Harry noticed his shiny purple nails again, and got an idea.

“Hey, babe, gimme a minute. I have an idea,” Harry said as he stepped back. Harry walked into his and Louis’ shared closet and quickly located what he was looking for.

Harry walked back out to Louis. “How about this?” Harry said, holding up what he had grabbed for Louis. It was one of Harry’s big sweaters, dark purple, oversize, and incredibly comfortable. Louis smiled brightly when he saw it.

“For me to wear?” he asked.

“Yup. It’ll go perfect with the fabulous nail polish,” Harry said, walking over to the bed. He located the arm holes from the inside and stood in front of Louis. “Arms up,” Harry instructed. Louis lifted his arms and Harry carefully put the sweater on Louis, pulling it gently down over his head so it wouldn’t mess up any of the makeup.

Louis lowered his arms when it was on, and smiled up at Harry. Harry crawled onto the bed now, grasping Louis’ hand and pulling him upwards on the mattress. Louis laid back and rested his head on his pillow and Harry crawled over him, on top of him, leaning on his elbows so he could look down at Louis.

Harry, too, was hard now, his length resting in the crease between Louis’ thighs. Louis’ hardness was pressed between them, pressed against Harry’s lower abdomen; the hem of the sweater Louis was wearing just hitting the tip of Louis’ erection. Harry rocked his body once, gently, eliciting a soft moan from Louis.

Harry leaned down for another kiss. He kissed Louis deeply and slowly, taking his time. He wanted Louis to feel delicate and soft and loved. Louis placed his hands softly at Harry’s hips.

Harry rocked into Louis again, gently, not causing too much friction yet. He reached one hand slowly downwards, just past Louis’ testicles, and pushed four fingers downward between Louis’ thighs, his thumb pressed against Louis’ balls. Louis took a deep, hitched breath and squeezed his thighs together tighter.

Harry kissed Louis again, letting his tongue explore Louis’ mouth as his fingers explored Louis down below. Harry turned his hand so his palm was facing forwards now, and pushed his middle finger deeper between the crease of Louis’ ass. The pad of Harry’s middle finger met Louis’ rim and Louis shuddered.

Harry kept his mouth on Louis’ mouth as he let his finger explore Louis, rubbing his rim very slowly and gently with one finger, just grazing over the outside, never pushing in.

Louis squirmed underneath Harry, and squeezed his hips with his hands. He loved it when Harry took things slow like this, but he had been hard for a while now and was getting anxious for more. His dick was fully erect now. Louis clenched and unclenched his thighs, feeling Harry’s hand between him.

Harry was moving frustratingly slowly. He continued to rub Louis slowly with one finger as they kissed. He began to slowly buck his hips so his erection slid along Louis’ thighs, and his belly pressed against Louis’ erection.

“My pretty baby,” Harry whispered as he pulled back from Louis’ lips. Louis went pink again and squeezed his eyes shut. He felt himself clenching as Harry teased him with his finger.

“Do you want more?” Harry asked, delivering soft kisses to Louis’ cheek now. Louis nodded as he pressed his bum down against Harry’s finger.

Harry moved off Louis suddenly, and rolled across the bed to grab the lube from the drawer in the nightstand. Louis pressed his palms together and pressed his hands between his thighs, rolling to his side to face Harry. He felt cozy and secure in Harry’s big sweater. Harry was back quickly.

“Want me to be behind you?” Harry asked, noticing Louis’ change of position. Louis nodded timidly. “Okay, babe. That’s okay. Just roll to your other side so I can use my right hand,” Harry instructed. Louis did as Harry asked; rolling his body so he was lying on his left side. Harry moved right up behind him. He grasped Louis’ top leg and pushed it forward so Louis’ knee was bent and his bum was more exposed.

He quickly coated his fingers with lube. He then pressed his chest into Louis’ back and moved his right hand down to Louis’ ass. Harry kissed and mouthed at the back of Louis’ neck as he pressed his fingers into the crease of Louis’ bum. His middle finger found his hole and he began to use the same motions as before, rubbing over his rim.

Louis squirmed against Harry and gripped the bedcovers with his hands. Harry moved a little quicker now that he was lubricated, and pressed one finger slowly inside Louis, all the way up, as deep as he could go. Louis inhaled sharply.

Harry loved doing this to Louis, loved feeling Louis’ body react to him. He always wanted to savor it as much as possible. Harry didn’t move for a moment, kept his hand and fingers completely still.

“I love you so much, Louis. You’re so beautiful. So sexy,” he whispered into Louis’ ear.

Louis could only whimper in response. Harry smiled at Louis’ little whimper and took some mercy, beginning to slowly pull his finger out and then very, very slowly thrust it back in again.

Harry twirled and twisted his finger when it was inside Louis, and felt Louis clench around him in pleasure. “Make your pretty noises for me, baby,” Harry encouraged. Louis let out a whine of arousal when Harry pressed in again, and curled his finger to hit Louis’ prostate.

Harry kept at it, slowly moving just one finger in and out. Louis’ squirmed, pushing his bum backwards, trying to get more. But Harry moved leisurely. He pushed his finger in and out, and then pulled it all the way out to tease at Louis’ rim with his fingertip, tickling him or twirling his finger in circles, only to press back in again.

Louis’ moaning and whining increased gradually with Harry’s touch. “That’s right, my pretty baby, just relax and enjoy it. You’re so pretty, Louis. So sexy for me,” Harry cooed into Louis’ ear. Harry pulled back a bit so he could watch his fingers going into and out of Louis. He watched Louis respond to him, moving his hips and his ass with Harry’s thrusts of his fingers. He felt like he could do this for hours.

Harry finally added a second finger when he felt Louis opening up to him. He again very slowly pressed two fingers in, and curled them to brush over Louis’ prostate. Louis moaned high in his throat.

He teased Louis for what felt like ages to Louis, pushing in deep and then pulling all the way out, fluttering his fingers against Louis’ rim, and then pushing back in. Harry was in heaven feeling the way Louis was responding to him, clenching and moaning and wriggling.

Harry began to scissor his fingers after a while, opening Louis up and preparing him for Harry. Harry had been impossibly hard this entire time. He pushed two fingers all the way in and then spread them open, feeling Louis’ tightness around him. Harry loved it, he could never get enough. No matter how much they did this, Louis was always so tight.

“Harry,” Louis moaned finally, pushing his bum backwards yet again into Harry’s fingers.

“You ready for me, baby?” Harry asked. Louis nodded vigorously.

“On top of me,” Louis said softly.

“Yeah? Okay, that’ll be nice. I can kiss you that way. And see your pretty face,” Harry said as he pulled his fingers out. He sat up on the mattress and began to move Louis, positioning his body so he was lying flat on his back, his legs open a little. Harry took a moment to gaze at his boyfriend, open and ready for him, wearing his big sweater, with his matching purple nail polish and pretty pink cheeks and lips.

“Harry,” Louis whined, squirming a bit when he noticed Harry staring at him.

“Sorry, baby. You’re just so pretty. So sexy,” Harry said. Louis blushed again and fisted his hands into Harry’s sweater. Harry moved his body on top of Louis and reached one hand back to guide one of Louis’ legs around him. Louis leg his other leg fall out to the side, his knee bent.

Harry moved right in to kiss Louis, simply unable to wait any longer. He kissed Louis slowly and with passion, and Louis kissed him back with equal eagerness.

After a moment, Harry reached down and grasped his length. He shifted his hips to line up with Louis. Harry pressed the tip of himself against Louis’ hole, but didn’t press in. He slowly stroked the head of his penis against Louis’ rim. Louis whined and moaned at the sensation.

Harry continued to do that for a moment, holding himself and rubbing just the tip against Louis. He could feel Louis clenching, wanting more.

Finally, Harry pressed in, but only past the tip, and then pulled out again. Louis moaned into Harry’s mouth and squeezed his eyes shut. He repeated this several times, pushing only the tip of his length inside, and then pulling out again, teasing himself as much as Louis.

“You’re so pretty, baby. So ready for me,” Harry whispered as he held himself inside Louis, only just on the edge, just the tip of him, and then pulled out again. Louis nodded, unable to speak. He had tears in his eyes, but Harry understood that they were good tears.

Louis was impossibly wet with lube and Harry’s precome. Harry was loving it. He continued to tease Louis, rubbing himself over Louis’ rim, and then gently pressing inside, but never going deep.

They were both already extremely close to climax when Harry pushed in all the way. He pushed his whole length inside Louis, bottoming out, and holding himself there.

Harry stared at Louis. They were both still. Louis gazed back, his jaw clenched. His cheeks were flushed red and he was drenched with sweat, they both were.

Finally Harry began to thrust, slowly, languidly. He would never go fast, never make Louis feel like he was being pounded. Harry pulled out and pushed back in again, moving unhurriedly. Louis gripped Harry’s waist, beginning to pant and whine.

Harry moved his hand to hold Louis’ erection. He didn’t pump at him, but instead just thumbed over the tip. Harry continued to press into Louis as he played with Louis’ dick, running his fingers over him, or holding him, or squeezing gently. They were both right on the edge.

When Louis came it was quiet. He released into Harry’s hand with a soft sigh, his eyes closed, face pressed against Harry’s neck. Harry held Louis through his orgasm, feeling Louis shudder and tremble against him, a few tears leaking down his cheeks.

Harry came moments later, inside Louis, with one last thrust. He cried out quietly, and held himself inside Louis.

Harry allowed himself to gently lie on Louis as they both came down. Harry kept himself inside Louis. He hugged him tightly, and Louis hugged back. They held one another tightly, impossibly close.

Finally, after Harry felt like he could move again, he rolled himself off Louis.

“Was that good, baby?” he asked Louis.

“Really, really good,” Louis replied softly. He rolled to his side to face Harry, curling up, grasping the sleeves of Harry’s sweater in his fists.

“We can do this any time you want, baby. My pretty baby,” Harry said as he rolled to his side facing Louis and brought one hand up to stroke Louis’ hair.

Harry played with Louis’ hair as Louis closed his eyes. Louis felt too lazy to go wash his face, and part of him wanted to sleep with is makeup on, curled in Harry’s arms.

“Is it okay to sleep… like this?” Louis asked quietly.

“Yeah, of course. I think it’s okay every once in a while,” Harry replied. He moved Louis again so he was facing the opposite way, back against Harry’s chest. He reached down and pulled the bedcovers over the two of them. Harry pulled Louis in tight. He leaned in and gave Louis a kiss on his cheek.

“Harry?” Louis said softly.

“Hmm? What is it, babe?” Harry asked, his eyes going heavy.

“Thank you. For this. For all of it,” Louis said as he nudged his feet against Harry’s feet. Harry smiled.

“I love you, Louis,” Harry whispered in reply.

“I love you, Harry,” Louis whispered back. He grasped Harry’s hand that was draped over his torso, and squeezed it tight. He didn’t think he had ever felt more lovely or delicate or loved. He was calm, his mind finally still. And it was because of Harry.

Harry curled himself tightly around Louis. They fell asleep tucked in each others’ arms.

 

~

 

In the morning Harry helped Louis clear out a special drawer just for his new things. Louis carefully put all his new makeup in the little makeup case and into the drawer, along with the two lotions and the perfume. He delicately placed the purple nail polish in last. He observed his little collection fondly. There was plenty of space for more.

 

……


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis admits to Harry he's ready to try wearing lace, so together they pick out some nice things for Louis

In the three weeks since Louis had first put on his makeup for Harry, Louis had acquired several more items for his collection. Some things he had bought, some things Harry had bought. Louis had several new colors of nail polish, courtesy of Harry’s inability to choose between all the different color options. Harry had also bought a special clear-sparkly top coat to add over colored polish that, when he gave it to Louis, made him tear up with happiness. And Louis had bought a tube of mascara to replace the one he had thrown out, as well as two colors of lipstick.

However, in the three weeks since Louis had first put on his makeup for Harry, he had only used it a total of two times. There were a multitude of reasons that Louis could come up with whenever Harry asked, including being too tired from rehearsals, or not wanting to bother painting his nails when he would have to remove the polish the next morning anyway. However, if Louis was being completely honest with himself, he was having trouble getting back into the proper headspace.

But it was not that Louis didn’t want it. In fact, it was the opposite. He wanted it so badly that it was overwhelming. Louis was used to being in control, used to being the one to take charge. But this newfound desire to feel pretty and soft in Harry’s arms was so new and so different for him, that he found it utterly perplexing. It was such a dramatic shift from who Louis was in public life that it was taking time for him to adjust. And the most overwhelming part of it was that Harry had been absolutely amazing through all of it. 

But the problem was, Louis still didn’t quite know what he wanted, or how to ask for it. And at the same time, he didn’t know how far Harry was willing to go. Part of the problem was that Louis felt Harry was almost too accommodating. In fact, he had been so open to all of this new stuff that it was honestly quite jarring for Louis. He didn’t know where his boundaries were. 

One thing Louis did recognize in himself with all of this was his seemingly unquenchable thirst for more. He always needed more. He was never satisfied. He had nail polish now, and makeup and various bath products. But he wanted more. He relished in the idea of feeling pretty, and of making himself pretty for Harry. But there were other ways to do that, other things they hadn’t yet explored.

It was a unique and very new dynamic that would have endless possibilities, if Harry was willing to go there. But again, Louis was having trouble knowing how to ask for what he wanted.

 

Painting his nails made Louis so happy, it made him want to keep his nails painted forever. And with the endless options for polishes, Louis knew this was entirely possible. But when Louis had to rush to take off his polish in the morning before rehearsal, it broke his heart. But he tried hard to take it all in stride, doing what he could with the time they had. And tonight they would finally have some time. 

Louis was currently attempting to paint his nails a beautiful dark blue color again. Harry had proudly found a color very similar to Louis’ original color that Perrie had painted on his nails all those weeks ago. Louis was getting better at it, too. He got the color on his cuticle less often, and was working on growing his nails out into a shape more fitting for the lovely polish. 

Harry would be home soon, and Louis hoped his nails would be dry before then. They hadn’t talked about it yet, but Louis was thinking that perhaps Harry would be up for a little bit of play later that night. It was Friday and they had a rare two days off in a row. Two full days that Louis could wear his nail polish, if he stayed in the house. The thought made Louis buzz with excitement. 

 

Thirty minutes later Louis was in the kitchen putting a pot of water on the stove to boil pasta for dinner. Harry arrived moments later carrying a small shopping bag as he entered the kitchen from the garage. 

“Hey babe,” he greeted sweetly, making his way straight over to Louis to give him a kiss.

“Welcome home,” Louis said against Harry’s mouth. Harry placed the shopping bag on the counter.

“Got you something. Just a little something I happened to see,” Harry said, making his way over to the boiling water and taking the lid off the pot. He then moved to a cupboard to choose a pasta.

Louis watched Harry bustle around for a moment. He desperately wanted Harry to notice his nails, so he found a cutting board and a knife and made a show of cutting the loaf of bread for their dinner. He looked over at Harry who was distracted with the pasta. Louis began to chew on his bottom lip. He kept his hands on the counter top and brought his attention to the bag Harry had brought home with him.

“What is it?” he asked, peering over to the bag.

“You’ll just have to open it to find out,” Harry said, glancing back at Louis. With Harry’s attention on him, Louis reached for the little shopping bag and pulled it over to himself. 

Finally Harry noticed. “Oh! You did your nails today! They’re beautiful, babe!” he exclaimed, abandoning the pasta now and moving over to Louis. Harry swiftly grasped one of Louis’ hands and brought it to his mouth, making a show of kissing his fingers quickly and sloppily.

Louis couldn’t help but giggle. It was the kind of attention that the more he got it, the more he craved it. 

“It’s one of the colors you got for me,” he said, speaking softly now, his hand still in Harry’s hand. 

“I see that,” Harry said with a smile, “It’s so pretty, baby.” Harry let Louis’ hand go and stepped forward, wrapping his arms Louis, engulfing him in a hug. Louis melted into Harry’s embrace, already feeling himself going soft and docile in his arms. 

They stood like that for a moment. Louis wrapped his arms around Harry, tucking his fingers into Harry’s back pockets. 

“Do you want to play a little tonight?” Harry whispered, his breath tickling Louis’ ear. Louis nodded.

“Maybe a lot,” he answered softly, his cheeks going rosy pink as he nuzzled his face into Harry’s neck. 

“Let me show what I got you really quick,” Harry said, reluctantly moving away from Louis to reach into the little shopping bag. Louis watched him pull a small purple case out of the bag. It looked like leather and was about the size of a wallet. 

“What is that?” he asked.

“It’s a nail grooming kit,” Harry explained, “I noticed you’re growing your nails out a bit. And all we have here is nail-clippers. But this has all sorts of things,” Harry explained as he handed the case to Louis. Louis smiled brightly as he took it. He unzipped it and opened it up. There were several metallic tools lined up inside. “That’s for pushing your cuticles back, and that’s for trimming them,” Harry explained, pointing to the tools. “And there’s two different sizes of nail clippers, see. And a few other things,” he finished. 

Louis could feel his throat getting tight, but he tried hard not to cry. He didn’t know what to say. He looked up into Harry’s eyes. “I love you,” he said quietly. Harry looked delighted. He smiled softly and pulled Louis into a hug.

“I love you too, Lou,” he replied against the side of Louis’ head. They stood quietly for a moment, in one another’s arms, before the pasta water began to boil over, pulling them back to the present. 

Harry laughed as he pulled away to attend to the boiling water. “I’m glad you like it,” he said simply, “Whenever you feel finished with the blue color, we can take that off and I can give you a real manicure.” 

Louis laughed to avoid another surge of emotion. There it was again; Harry’s overwhelming support. It was hard for Louis to even believe that he could have found such an amazing boyfriend. Someone who was so willing to give Louis everything he wanted, even these eccentric things that Louis didn’t quite understand. 

But Louis realized that maybe Harry’s understanding was enough. Maybe Louis didn’t have to fully get it, he didn’t have to explain it and label it and wrap it up in a nice pretty box to open when it was convenient. Harry wasn’t demanding that. In fact, harry was demanding nothing. The only thing he had ever asked was that Louis be open and honest and tell him exactly what it was he wanted. 

That was the part Louis knew he had to work on: expressing what he needed. It was complicated, and there was a lot of emotion involved. But Louis realized that with Harry’s understanding, he might just be able to figure out how to do that.

 

Louis stood in front of the big bathroom mirror. He had butterflies in his stomach from anticipation. He stared at his reflection. He had put on mascara and lip gloss only, not yet having gotten the knack for the eyeliner. He had also shaved again, preferring his face to be smooth and soft when he wore his makeup. Louis knew Harry was waiting for him in the bedroom, but he still felt too anxious to start just yet. 

Louis looked at his body in the mirror. He was wearing only boxers. Louis frowned at his reflection. He suddenly hated the loose, boyish-looking plaid fabric. It didn’t suit his face, or his body for that matter. Louis stripped the boxers off quickly, tossing them aside. 

He looked at himself again. He put both hands on the narrowest part of his waist, wrapping his fingers around, thumbs facing backwards and his other fingers splayed out on his abdomen. He looked at the way his blue fingernails stood out against his pale skin. He then turned his attention to his body. Louis had always had a mild dislike for his body. He had what could be described as a pear-shaped figure: a narrow waist with larger hips and bum. 

He turned to the side, looking at his profile in the mirror now. Louis sucked in his stomach. He gazed at his curvy reflection. Harry had always loved his bum, and would constantly find an excuse to touch or grab it when they were in private. As Louis was contemplating all of this, Harry suddenly spoke from the bedroom.

“Everything okay, babe?” he asked, through the bathroom door. Louis jumped back to the present with the sound of Harry’s voice. He had been keeping Harry waiting for almost thirty minutes now. 

“Yeah… I… I’m fine,” Louis stuttered. He turned his attention back to his face, double checking that he didn’t have mascara on his eyelids or lip gloss on his teeth. The last element that Louis added was a spritz of the flowery-smelling perfume Harry had bought him. After the nail polish, the perfume was probably Louis’ favorite addition to his ensemble. He loved the idea the Harry had picked out the scent just for him. He looked at himself again. Passing his own inspection, Louis decided he was ready. 

He opened the bathroom door and walked slowly out into the bedroom. Harry had been playing on his phone out of boredom, but turned his full attention to Louis when he entered the room, smiling lovingly at Louis.

“You look beautiful, babe,” Harry praised, sitting up straighter in bed. Louis smiled coyly and made his way quickly over to the bed. He loved the way Harry looked at him when he was made-up like this, but Harry’s look also made him nervous, and he usually couldn’t handle it for long without becoming a giggling mess. 

Louis climbed over Harry into bed, and Harry immediately moved right up next to him, curling an arm around his waist and a leg on top of Louis’ legs.

“You’re so pretty, Louis,” Harry said again, speaking quietly this time, directly into Louis’ ear. Louis blushed at the praise and felt blood rush into his cock. He didn’t think he would ever get used to that adoring tone in Harry’s voice.

“Keep saying that,” Louis whispered as Harry began to press kisses into his temple. 

“I love you… so much… baby. You’re so sweet… and so beautiful,” Harry said in between kisses. He kissed all over Louis’ cheek and jaw and the edge of his mouth as his hand roamed Louis’ torso. 

Harry flicked his thumb over Louis’ nipples and caressed his tummy and ran a finger along the skin just above Louis’ pelvis as he whispered little incantations into Louis’ ear.

Louis felt his anxiety melting away as he let Harry take control. He loved that Harry knew exactly what to do and exactly what to say and exactly how to touch him.

Harry moved slowly, taking his time, being as gentle as he could. And when Harry moved a hand down past Louis’ cock, Louis’ legs opened instinctively for him as the last of his nervousness disappeared, and he felt himself going quiet and pliant.

Harry took his opening Louis up, using one finger and then two, and moving to three only when Louis was panting, his eyes closed, his face turned sideways and pressed into Harry’s chest. 

Louis moaned when Harry removed his fingers, but Harry was quick to move on top of Louis, settling his hips between Louis’ open legs and kissing Louis on the mouth fully and deeply. 

And still Harry took his time, licking across Louis’ lips and into his mouth, and still pulling away every now and then to whisper gentle words of praise and love. Louis didn’t speak, much preferring to let Harry do all the talking. 

When Louis was ready, he ever so slightly bucked his hips up into Harry’s hips. Harry took the hint, reaching down to grasp Louis’ left leg under his thigh and hitching it up to open Louis further. Harry then grasped his length and angled himself into Louis, still moving slowly and as gently as possible. 

He locked eyes with Louis as he entered him, and Louis let out a closed-mouth moan as Harry pressed in deeply. Louis was already incredibly aroused by the time Harry began to thrust, not thrusting with his legs but only rolling his hips so as to keep the action tender and slow. And Louis felt warm and safe under Harry. This was exactly what he wanted. He let out a sigh and felt Harry smile against his neck at the sound. 

Louis wrapped his legs and arms around Harry, just feeling into him, feeling his muscles ripple underneath his fingertips and hot breath on Louis’ neck. They were both sweaty, their skin flushed with heat. Louis felt like he was engulfed in a warm blanket. He felt Harry slide in and out of him, picking up speed as their arousal built together.

They came almost at the same time, Harry crying out, and Louis letting out a soft, high whine of pleasure as he felt Harry spilling into him. 

Louis still clung onto Harry after they came down, so Harry didn’t pull out right away. He loved to stay inside Louis for as long as possible anyway. He felt Louis’ shuddering breaths on the top of his shoulder, and sucked a love-bite into Louis’ neck. 

“I love you so much, Louis,” Harry whispered into Louis’ ear. Louis still wasn’t at the point of forming words yet, so instead he nodded vigorously. 

Louis grunted when Harry finally pulled out and rolled off of him, back to his side, never fully breaking contact. Harry nuzzled himself back against Louis, his mouth at Louis’ ear. They were quiet for several minutes, just breathing together. 

Eventually Harry’s hand began to roam Louis’ body again, thumbing over his hip bones or bellybutton, and playing with the come on Louis’ abdomen. 

“Was that good?” Harry asked quietly, breaking the silence. Louis simply nodded again. He wasn’t in a speaking mood yet. Harry gazed at Louis: his dark, feathery eyelashes, his pretty, shiny lips. He looked truly beautiful. 

A new thought dawned on Harry, and he spoke it out loud as it came to him. “Is there anything else?” he asked Louis, still speaking quietly, his hands on Louis’ body. Louis turned his head to make eye contact with Harry. 

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“I mean, is there anything more you want to do with… with this? Anything you want to add? Anything I can get for you, or do for you?” Harry spoke, bringing a hand to Louis’ jaw. 

An answer came immediately to Louis’ mind, but he was not sure if he was ready to voice it out loud yet. But Harry seemed to pick up on the fact that there was, in fact, something more Louis wanted. He knew there was a thought in Louis’ mind, but also knew he might have trouble voicing the words.

Louis began to toy with the hem of the bed sheets, wondering how to word what it was he wanted. 

“If you tell me,” Harry said, “I’m sure I’ll want to do it.” Louis’ cheeks flushed red just at the idea. There it was again: Harry’s ridiculous generosity. His unbelievable willingness to give Louis everything he wanted. 

But even with Harry’s openness, the idea still felt strange to Louis. He had been telling himself it wasn’t normal, so how could he now just say it openly to Harry like it was something completely okay? Louis took a deep breath. He knew he had to try. The only thing Harry was asking for was openness. He didn’t have to make sense of it, he just had to let it out. 

“I was thinking… I just thought maybe…” he really didn’t know how to begin. His anxiety was returning. He didn’t want to look Harry in the eye. 

Harry was quiet. He let Louis gather his thoughts. He kept a reassuring hand on Louis’ hip. 

“I was thinking… maybe it would be okay if I… like if I w-wore s-something to bed?” Louis stammered. His whole body felt hot, and he hid his face against Harry’s chest again.

Harry smiled, his heart swelling with adoration for his boy. If he was being honest with himself, he had already known that was something Louis might want eventually. He was not the least bit surprised, and Louis could feel it. Once the words were out there, Louis felt his body relax a bit, he took another deep breath and dared to turn his head so he was no longer pressed against Harry. 

Nonetheless, Harry wanted to confirm what Louis was referring to. “Like, lace? Lace panties?” Harry said, calmly and softly. Louis nodded. 

“Absolutely, baby. Of course we can do that,” Harry confirmed, pressing a kiss to Louis’ forehead. But Louis needed more than that.

“Do you think… do you think that would be nice?” he asked softly, his fingers still toying with the sheets. 

“Definitely,” Harry said quickly. But Louis let out a frustrated huff. 

“No, I mean…” Louis tried to explain. He needed to be absolutely certain. “Is that something… something you would like?”

“I want whatever you want, baby,” Harry said. Louis shook his head and turned on his side to face Harry now. 

“Don’t just say that,” Louis admonished quickly. 

“I’m not, Lou,” Harry replied, “Really. I’m not just saying it. I want it. I’m telling you I want it, too,” he explained, bringing a hand up again to cup Louis’ jaw. Louis nodded but bowed his head slightly, looking down again instead of meeting Harry’s gaze. 

“I think you would look so sexy,” Harry added, suddenly realizing that was what Louis was looking for. 

And Louis lifted his head. “Yeah? You think I would look sexy?” he asked, his eyes going wide, his face full of expectation and hope.

“So sexy, baby,” Harry confirmed with a nod. He leaned close into Louis, his lips just centimeters from Louis’ lips, “You would look so sexy in pretty pink lace panties for me, baby. The lace stretched out across your gorgeous bum. I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off you,” he whispered, ending it with a kiss on the mouth. 

Louis blushed and smiled into the kiss. He thought he might cry with how overwhelmingly happy he was in that moment. 

 

It had been three days since Louis had mentioned the idea to Harry. In that time, Louis had deliberately kept silent about it, feeling nothing but shame now that it had even slipped out of his mouth. Louis couldn’t help but think that perhaps Harry was not really as open to the idea as he had originally let on. He thought Harry may have even forgotten. Part of him hoped he had. 

But Harry had not forgotten. In fact, he felt like it was the only thing he could think about. He had even done research. Harry had quickly realized that this was something not only Louis wanted, but Harry wanted it as well. He wanted to see Louis dressed up for him in delicate lace panties that stretched over his perfect meaty bum, his cock hard and poking out the top. And whenever Harry thought about it he could practically feel the blood rushing to his cock. 

Harry knew Louis would not take the initiative to start up another conversation about it, so Harry knew it would be his job. He had caught Louis in a moment of vulnerability that night, and he hoped, to some extent, to be able to do that again. Louis was not yet at the point that he could easily talk openly about this fantasy of his, and Harry was well aware of that. 

 

That night, Harry made Louis his favorite meal. Afterwards, Harry drew them a bath and they had some quiet sexy time in the tub. Harry washed Louis’ hair and held him close in the warm water, whispering little words of praise and love, Louis going soft and melting into Harry. 

Afterwards, wrapped up in their big matching bathrobes, they snuggled into bed together. And Harry could tell Louis was in that place again. He was in the proper headspace, and might, just might, open up if Harry asked for it. 

“I wanted to show you something, babe,” Harry said, trying hard not to sound nervous as he watched Louis fiddle with his phone, sitting cross-legged on the mattress. Harry sat up with his back against the headboard and grabbed Louis’ legs to angle them across his lap, Louis’ legs bent over Harry’s thighs. 

“Mm? What is it?” Louis asked absentmindedly as he tossed his phone aside and nuzzled against the front of Harry’s shoulder. His bum was on the mattress but his legs were lying perpendicular across Harry’s lap. 

Harry reached over to the nightstand to grab his laptop. He placed a pillow on his knees with the laptop on top of the pillow. “I was visiting a few websites for… for you,” he began, opening his laptop, the websites mimimized at the bottom of the screen. 

Louis knew right away what Harry was referring to. He felt his whole body getting hot, his cheeks flushing red, and his heart starting to race. He knew he should have known that Harry would not have forgotten. He also knew he should be thrilled, but right then he felt only shame and insecurity. 

“Oh, we… we don’t have to really do that…” Louis stuttered, curling his arms into himself and hiding his face against Harry’s shoulder. 

“I knew you would say that,” Harry said softly, wrapping his left arm behind Louis’ back and hugging him tight. “But I already did the research and I have the websites open right here. So it would be pointless not to at least look,” Harry tried to reason.

“Really, you don’t have to do this for me. I’m just being silly and needy. But it’s not a big deal,” Louis said, his voice shaky and quiet. 

“Babe, you don’t have to second guess yourself. You don’t have to do that. Not with me,” Harry spoke, whispering the last sentence against Louis’ temple. He gave Louis a kiss against his hairline and turned back to the computer. 

“I just don’t want you to feel obligated,” Louis said. He knew he was being stubborn, but was also intent on making certain that Harry didn’t feel like this was something he had to do, like he had no choice.

“Lou,” Harry spoke assertively now, “Stop that. If this is something you genuinely don’t want, then we won’t do it. But just know that I’m not doing this because I feel like I have to. I’m doing it because I want to.” Louis looked up now, directly into Harry’s beautiful green eyes, bright with anticipation and concern. 

“You want to?” he asked softly. Harry’s face softened into a smile.

“Yes, Louis. I want to,” Harry confirmed, “I want to see you in pretty lace panties,” he whispered, moving his forehead against Louis’ forehead. Louis’ cheeks went pink again but he didn’t turn away. “I want to see your beautiful bum in pretty lace,” Harry continued, kissing Louis nose and his cheek. “You’ll look so beautiful. So sexy. And you can wear your lip gloss and perfume and things for me. You’ll be so pretty. It’s getting me hard just thinking about it. Your beautiful cock stretching the lace. And I could rub up against you. And it would feel so good against your skin,” he whispered, delivering little kisses all over Louis’ face and jaw. And Louis simply melted into the kisses, listening to Harry’s deep, sensual voice.

They stayed quiet for a moment, Louis pressed against Harry, his body hot and a little sweaty already. Harry kept his face pressed into Louis’ temple, and they simply breathed together. 

After several minutes, Harry straightened again and leaned back against the headboard once more. Louis settled into Harry, his body turned to face the computer on Harry’s legs, but leaning back against Harry, Harry’s arm still around him.

“So,” Harry began, speaking softly still, “There’s some different options.” He opened his internet browser and several of the bookmarked websites. Louis nodded, allowing Harry to take the lead and show him. His curiosity was peaked. Harry took a deep breath. He was well aware of the fact that it was very likely that Louis really didn’t know what he wanted, and that it would take some time and exploration. He was weary of asking his next question, but knew it was a logical place to begin.

“Do you know if you want… if you want women’s or men’s?” he asked, trying to be as gentle as possible, not betraying his own desires, but wanting to allow Louis to choose. 

“Men’s?” Louis asked, surprise in his voice, “I didn’t know that existed.”

“Oh yeah, for sure,” Harry explained, “There’s whole websites just for lace and satin underwear for men. Really,” he said, deciding to start there. He opened the website he had found the other day. 

It was exactly as Harry had described: a whole site dedicated to selling feminine undergarments, but made for men. And the male models were tan and toned, with large muscles and big dicks, filling out the panties that were specifically designed for that purpose. 

Harry couldn’t fully see Louis’ face, with the way he was angled at the computer, but he could tell Louis was somewhat apprehensive. Deciding it would be best to give him a moment, Harry began to slowly click through the site. He clicked on the “lace” category and began to scroll down the long page of different options, each pair of panties being modeled by a different male model. 

It wasn’t quite what Louis would have imagined. The male models were big, and quite muscular. They were posed with their legs sprawled out, their big dicks bulging out the delicate lace. And they were hairy. Chest hair and thick dark leg hair and even quite a bit of facial hair in some cases. It was a strange juxtaposition. Harry paused a few times, but then would continue to scroll when Louis did not speak up. Louis just looked.

Finally after a few minutes, Harry stopped. “How about these,” he said, gesturing with the cursor on screen to a black pair, lace and cotton, bikini-style. 

Louis allowed himself to consider the pair. They were nice, not too feminine, relatively speaking. The model wearing them was bulky, with angular features. He had a serious, almost angry look to his face. His bulge was huge, and he held himself in a manly way, muscles flexed, legs spread open. 

Louis found himself scrunching his nose in displeasure. He shook his head no. 

“Okay,” Harry said softly, and continued to scroll. 

They carried on like this for several minutes. Harry pausing every now and then to point out possibilities, Louis vetoing all of them. When they got to the end of the lace section, Harry scrolled back up and clicked on “satin”. But it was more of the same type of thing, and not what Louis was looking for. He found himself becoming frustrated, huffing in annoyance at the overly-manly models. It was like they were trying too hard. It didn’t fit. 

“This is crap. This isn’t right. Look at these guys, like they’re all meat-heads!” Louis finally declared, laughing as he said it, but more out of frustration than out of amusement. 

“Well, they’re just the models. Look at the panties, not the models,” Harry said, trying to figure out how to make Louis more comfortable. But Louis didn’t even seem to hear him. 

“And look at their fucking hairy backs. Like, that guy looks like Chewbacca!” Louis said, gesturing at the screen in a disgruntled manner. Harry laughed lightly at Louis’ description of the model. 

“Well, yeah. It is kind of strange. You’d think they would have a variety of models,” Harry said, still smiling and continuing to scroll down the site. 

“I mean, that guy, look at his biceps! And his dick is like… I mean… those underwear have to be stuffed with a sock. That’s gotta be a sock!” Louis declared. Harry laughed out loud now, the laptop wiggling in his lap as he laughed. Louis giggled along with him. “Like, they’re all got giant pecs and look at this guy’s legs! Is he a fucking Olympic speed-skater or something?” Harry barked out a laugh.

“Maybe there’s a sight with guys who are more… who look more like…” Harry tried, but stopped himself. He knew exactly what Louis was trying to say, without actually saying it. Louis’ body didn’t look anything like these guys, they both knew it. And there was nothing wrong with it at all. Harry loved Louis’ little waist and his feminine hips and his meaty bum. He loved that Louis had slim shoulders and soft skin. And Louis’ arms and legs were trim: toned from playing football, rather than bulky from lifting weights. 

Louis rested his head against the front of Harry’s shoulder again, going quiet now. They both knew what the problem was. Harry contemplated it for a moment. 

“Well… we could try the women’s sights, if you want?” he asked softly, squeezing Louis’ shoulder. Louis didn’t respond right away, so Harry took the initiative and opened the other sight he had bookmarked. It was Victoria’s Secret. Harry hadn’t been able to come up with anything else, and a few minutes on the VS website told him this was basically what he was looking for. 

The site was easy to use and organized, breaking down the multitude of options into simple categories, and offering various ways to narrow-down a search. On top of that, the options were presented in a sexy way without being vulgar. It was not pornographic in any way, but rather quite elegant, relatively speaking. 

“Victoria’s Secret?” Louis asked, in a curious way. 

“Yeah, it was the only thing I could think of. And they’ve got a good site. I think… I think this is more what you’re looking for,” Harry explained as he began to click around. Harry clicked on “panties” along the top header. “See, you can search by style,” he said, gesturing to the options, “Thongs, bikinis, briefs…” Louis nodded, watching Harry navigate around the screen. 

“What’s ‘cheekies’?” Louis asked, noticing the word he didn’t recognize. Harry clicked on the category. 

“Looks like panties that show off your bum cheeks,” he observed, scrolling down the page. “You would look great in one of these,” he added softly, pressing another kiss to the top of Louis’ head. 

He scrolled slowly, feeling the change in Louis almost instantly. He was paying closer attention now, and had angled his body towards the screen, rather than against Harry in an apprehensive manner. Harry could tell this was much more what Louis was looking for. “Let me know if you see something you like,” he said. 

After a moment, a pair caught Louis’ eye, “Wait,” he said as Harry scrolled past, “Go back up,” Louis instructed. Harry scrolled back up. Louis looked for a moment.

“See something you like?” Harry asked, looking at the screen. Very slowly, Louis lifted his arm and reached out, pointing to a picture on the screen. 

It was a lovely pair of ‘cheekies,’ all-lace, and dark-blue in color. They looked great on the model, hugging her narrow hips and accentuating her bum. 

“Those are great,” Harry observed, “And I like the color.” Harry knew he was out of his element. Looking at sexy women in lingerie was not one of his typical before-bed activities, but he could picture Louis in the panties with no problem. And he had to admit, this particular style would look amazing stretched over Louis’ bum. He clicked on the photo to be able to see the color and sizing options. 

“Look at all these other colors they come in,” Harry observed, dragging the mouse cursor over the eight other color options. 

“Click on that one,” Louis asked, pointing to a peach color. Harry clicked on the peach color and the picture changed. The panties looked just as good in peach. 

Louis brought his thumb to his mouth, biting his nail.

“This one is good, too,” Harry said, clicking now on a purple color. He waited a moment. Louis was simply observing the picture, clearly lost in thought. Harry shook his shoulder gently. “You want these?” he asked softly. 

Louis continued to chew on his thumbnail. He couldn’t shake the feeling that this was too weird, and wrong in some way. He clenched his jaw, trying to fight back a well of emotions. He wanted them. He wanted them very badly, but he hadn’t even known how badly he wanted it until that very moment. 

Louis tried to keep his emotions even, but when he drew in a breath, it was shaky and halted. Harry could feel Louis’ hesitation, but he could also feel his desire. 

“Hey, babe,” Harry consoled, “I told you before, and I mean it. I want this as much as you do. And it’s okay.” Louis blinked back the tears that were welling up in his eyes. 

“You don’t think it’s, like, messed up?” Louis asked, his voice cracking.

“No, no, no. Not at all. And don’t even think like that,” Harry said quickly as he leaned his face down again and pressed another set of kisses into Louis’ hair. 

“But it is weird,” Louis argued.

“Nah, it’s not weird. It’s special,” Harry countered. They sat in silence for a moment, Louis breathing deeply to control this flood of emotions. 

“Okay,” he said softly after several minutes. 

“Okay?” Harry repeated. 

“Okay,” Louis said, nodding. “I like these. Can we… can we get them?” Harry smiled adoringly. 

“Of course. Do you want a few different colors?” he asked, turning his attention back the computer. Louis nodded. He looked at his fingernails once again. The blue would look lovely with a pair of blue lace panties to match, Louis thought. His mind wandered to his drawer of other colors.

“I like the blue… and the peach. And also black just ‘cuz it’s simple,” Louis said softly. Harry one by one clicked on each color and added it to the shopping cart. 

“I would click ‘small’ but I think with your gorgeous bum we should get ‘medium,’ yeah?” Harry said, chuckling. Louis laughed too.

“Yeah, medium,” Louis agreed. 

“And how about this purple color?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, add that one too,” Louis said with a nod. 

“And what about another style? Just something different, so we have options in case the ‘cheeky’ style, or whatever it was called, doesn’t work out?” Harry suggested, scrolling back up the page once the four pairs were added to their cart. 

“Yeah, okay. What about just regular bikini-style?” Louis said. Harry navigated to the bikini section. He scrolled down the page before Louis pointed out a pair he liked. They were simple; cotton with a lace waistband. They actually looked relatively comfortable. 

“I like these, too,” Louis whispered after a moment. 

“Do you like this color, or another color?” Harry asked. They were gray and green, a feminine shape but not particularly feminine colors. 

“Yeah. I like the color. Just the one pair of these is good,” Louis said. Harry added them to the cart without another question. 

“Okay, is that it? Ready to check out?” Harry asked, clicking on the shopping cart. 

“Yeah, that’s definitely enough,” Louis said as he scanned down the options they chose. 

Harry completed the check-out process quickly, having already placed his wallet on the nightstand so it was ready. When the panties were ordered, Harry shut down his laptop and moved it back over to the nightstand. Louis moved his legs off Harry and curled up on his side, facing Harry. Harry mirrored Louis, lying on his side curled up facing Louis. 

“You okay,babe?” Harry asked Louis after a moment. He was beginning to learn how very important it would be to keep communicating, through all of this, to continue to check in with one another. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay…” Louis spoke softly. Harry could tell Louis was in his head now. 

“Listen, we’re gonna take this slow, okay?” Harry assured Louis. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. And I’ll be there with you the whole time.” Louis smiled gently and nodded.

“I know. I know, Harry,” he whispered, “And you’re amazing, by the way,” he added.

“You’re amazing, too,” Harry said. “Really. To be able to talk about this and tell me about this, it requires a lot of strength and trust. And I’m so happy that you trust me that way.”

“Of course I trust you,” Louis assured Harry. He scooted his body forward to snuggle into Harry, pressing their fronts together. 

Louis still felt insecurity and he still felt doubt, but he also felt he was at the start of moving beyond those things. He knew he was safe and loved and, most importantly, that Harry understood him. And really that was all Louis could ask for; for someone to understand.

Harry slid his hand down to rest over Louis’ bum and draped a leg over Louis’ legs, and Louis pressed himself against Harry’s chest. Tranquility settled over them. In that moment, Louis was calm and happy in Harry’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)


	5. Chapter 5

Exactly one week after ordering the panties, the small package was waiting outside the front door when Harry got home one day. He snatched it up happily and practically skipped inside to open it. Harry decided if they were going to use them that night, he would need time to wash and dry them before use, so he reasoned they should be opened now.

Harry found scissors and very carefully sliced open the plastic shipping bag the purchases had come in. He gingerly dumped the individually-wrapped panties onto the counter and began to unwrap them one by one. Harry found his heart was racing. He hadn’t realized how excited he was about this until that moment.

He laid out each pair on the counter top with care, admiring the lace and pretty colors. They had done well, he thought, picking out the right things. There were four pairs that Harry knew would hug Louis’ bum in the best possible way, one each in blue, peach, black, and purple. Then there was another pair, cotton and lace, which Harry thought Louis might find more comfortable if need be. Harry smiled, looking at the selection, and could only hope Louis would feel the way he did about them.

Harry scooped them all up and brought them into the laundry room. He filled the sink with warm water and dumped in some detergent, swishing it around in the water to mix it in. He then added the five sets of delicate panties, swirling them around to wash them gently. 

His mind wandered as he moved his hands through the warm water. He thought about Louis coming home later and seeing them. He wondered how Louis would feel slipping into them. Harry supposed Louis might be self conscious at first, and that it would take some time to ease him into the fantasy. Yes, it would definitely take time. Harry knew this was something as new for Louis as it was for him. It would be a discovery for both of them, but Harry could already feel himself tingling at the thought of Louis wearing one of these pairs of panties. Harry pictured Louis’ beautiful bum stretching the lace, his cock poking out the top in the front. 

Harry was almost surprised to realize how much he too clearly wanted this. He made a mental note to make sure Louis was aware of how much this meant to Harry, and how excited he was. 

 

Louis arrived home a few hours later, after harry had hung the panties to dry on the edge of the sink. Harry made his way down the stairs when he heard Louis shuffling about in the kitchen. 

“Hey, boo,” Harry greeted warmly as he made his way to Louis for a kiss.

“How was your lunch?” Louis asked, returning Harry’s peck on the lips.

“Pretty good. I’ll have to go to LA in another few weeks,” Harry chatted, although his mind was somewhere else. Louis nodded. Harry decided not to skirt around the topic. “Did you happen to notice what was in the laundry room sink as you passed through there just now?” he asked with a tender smile, moving to wrap his arms around Louis and resting them on his low back. Louis smiled at the ground and Harry thought he noticed his cheeks go a little pink.

“Yes, I noticed,” he said, pressing his forehead into Harry’s chest and muffling his words. Harry laughed gently.

“Did you like them?” he asked, dropping his own head to kiss the top of Louis’.

“I think so. But I walked by pretty quick,” Louis replied softly. 

“Well let’s go take a look, then,” Harry said, moving slowly away from Louis and grasping his hand to pull him along into the laundry room.

“I really like the colors we chose,” Harry offered when they were standing at the sink, Louis simply looking at the panties, but not yet touching. A somewhat uneasy silence fell between them. Harry observed Louis’ face, but it was blank and expressionless. Harry looked back to the sink. 

Finally Louis spoke, his voice sounding weary and unsure, “This is weird, isn’t it. This is definitely weird,” he said, still staring at the panties draped over the edges of the sink. 

“No, Louis. It’s really not that weird. And who cares anyway? If you like it, that’s all that matters,” Harry tried to reassure him. But the words seemed to be lost on Louis, who appeared to be deep in his own thoughts. 

Louis reached out and gently grasped the edge of the blue lace pair between his thumb and index finger, and very softly caressed the fabric. 

“So do you want to try them out?” Harry asked softly. 

“Yeah, I guess,” Louis answered with a noncommittal shrug. 

“Let’s bring them all upstairs,” Harry said as he gathered all five pairs in one hand, and grasped Louis’ hand with the other to lead him upstairs.

“So do you want to try them on, and then show them off for me?” Harry asked as they made their way into the bedroom. 

“Um… okay,” Louis replied hesitantly as Harry turned to hand Louis the panties. “Which one?” he asked, taking them. 

“Whichever one you want, babe. It’s up to you,” Harry replied in what he hoped was an encouraging way. Louis nodded again and let go of Harry’s hand.

“So I guess I’ll go into the toilet? And… come out when I’m ready?” he asked, his voice soft and almost shaking. His hesitancy was not lost on Harry.

“Lou, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. I’m not trying to force it, I just know it’s something you want,” Harry tried to explain as Louis turned away to head into the bathroom.

“I know, I know, Haz. I’m fine” Louis replied as he quickly closed the door behind him. Harry took a seat on the edge of the bed to wait. He wondered if he had rushed Louis too much, if in his eagerness he had been too pushy. He knew Louis would like to take his time with something like this. Harry could only wait at this point.

 

Louis stood in front of the large bathroom mirror. He looked down at the panties grasped in his fist, and then back up at his reflection. He felt like his mind was completely blank. He was apprehensive, but he didn’t know why. It felt strange, but not in a good way.

Louis arranged the lace undergarments across the bathroom counter top, deciding he should get going and not keep Harry waiting. He decided on the black pair to start with tonight, figuring black would be a safe bet for their first time doing this. He noticed his unpainted fingernails and scrunched his nose in dislike. He had wanted to paint his nails for this, maybe to match the panties he wore, but there wouldn’t be time now. 

Louis swallowed against the tightening feeling in his throat. He began to strip off his clothes, moving deliberately but quickly. When he was stood naked in front of the mirror, Louis took another moment to look at himself. He thought maybe he should take a moment to put on some mascara or something, to get himself into the proper headspace. More than anything he wanted to feel soft and pretty for Harry, but he certainly was not feeling that now. 

Instead, he felt off. He didn’t feel like himself, and was feeling too rushed. But he also knew he wanted this so badly. Louis tried to shake it off. He told himself that he had had a week to prepare for this, and he couldn’t be a baby about it.

Louis grabbed the black lace panties and held them up against his body. He wondered if he should get himself hard before going out for Harry. He wondered if that was what Harry wanted to see, or if that would be strange. Louis shook off the thoughts and stepped gingerly into the panties and pulled them quickly up his legs. 

When they were pulled all the way up, Louis reached in and tried to adjust himself to fit in the little, delicate panties, but it was an awkward fit as the women’s panties were not made to accommodate anything extra down there. 

Louis turned around to look at how his bum looked in the lace. He thought it looked decent, but wasn’t sure what Harry would think. Louis continued to stare at himself for several more minutes, twisting around this way and that to see all the different angles of his body in the mirror. 

Something felt off, Louis couldn’t deny it. But he hoped he just needed time. He adjusted the waistband of the panties a few times and continued to look at himself from different angles in the mirror. 

Louis eventually realized with unease that he was not feeling aroused. He wondered if that was normal. He wondered if Harry was feeling aroused out in the bedroom, if he was touching himself in preparation for Louis, if he was expecting Louis to be ready for him in that way as well. Just as Louis was contemplating this he heard Harry speak from out in the bedroom.

“You almost ready, baby?” Harry yelled through the door. 

“Um, yeah, almost,” Louis replied, still staring at his reflection. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other. 

Louis moved over to his drawer with his makeup in it and opened it up, hoping something would inspire him and get him in the mood. He rifled through the drawer, looking at the lip gloss and eye shadow and nail polish, but nothing was feeling right. 

The lace felt constricting; it was an unusual sensation. Louis imagined if he was hard it might be arousing, the feeling of the lace holding him in, but right now it was simply an unnerving reminder that he had never done this before. 

On top of that, the idea of Harry out there, waiting for him to come out and then looking at him, made Louis’ stomach turn. That was not what he wanted. He did not want to be on display. 

Louis glanced at Harry’s watch laid out on the counter top. He felt a wave of panic seeing he had been keeping Harry waiting for almost thirty minutes.

There was sudden knock on the bathroom door, making Louis jump. “Louis, you okay? Do you need any help?” Harry asked softly from the other side of the door. 

“Don’t come in! I… I’m not ready,” he rushed out, slamming the drawer closed. There wouldn’t be any time for makeup now. 

“I’m not. I just wanted to check on you,” Harry replied gently. 

Louis felt tears coming to his eyes; it was a wave of emotion he couldn’t explain. He cursed himself for being so childish. He didn’t know why he wasn’t getting into this, but something didn’t feel right. He wanted Harry to see him, but not in this way. He didn’t want to reveal himself to Harry, he simply wanted Harry to be there with him, guiding him and loving him and showing him what to do.

He felt himself breathing quickly, his heart racing, knowing Harry was standing just on the other side of the door. Louis moved over to the toilet, closed the lid, and sat down, wrapping his arms around himself. He knew he just needed to take a deep breath and calm down a little. 

Louis hugged himself and rocked back and forth, sitting on the toilet, trying to take deep breaths. His breathing was halted, and that tightness in his throat wouldn’t go away. Louis tried to blink away a few tears. 

“Lou, you sure you’re okay?” Harry asked through the door. Louis could tell he was standing just on the other side, listening closely. Louis could see under the door the shadows of Harry’s feet as he shifted his weight, standing right up against the door. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m okay,” Louis said quickly, although his voice broke and he knew he wasn’t sounding convincing.

“Louis, can I just come in?” Harry asked, his voice sounding concerned now. 

Harry stood on the other side of the door, his hand poised on the door handle. He could tell Louis was not okay, and he was beginning to worry. He knew Louis well. He knew that Louis would try to deal with his emotions on his own. Whatever he was feeling, he would try to push it back and put up his defenses. But that was not what Harry wanted. He wanted, needed Louis to share with him whatever he was feeling. He wanted to be there for him, however he could be. He knew the door wasn’t locked, and that he really could walk in if he wanted to; but he also wanted to respect Louis’ privacy.

“No, don’t come in!” Louis spoke from in the bathroom. Harry held back a frustrated huff. He could hear the anxiety in Louis’ voice. 

“Louis, babe. It’s okay, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” Harry offered, completely unsure of where Louis’ thoughts were at the moment. 

“No, it’s okay, I want to,” Louis replied, his voice sounding strangled and high pitch. 

 

Inside the bathroom Louis had quickly stripped off the panties and pulled his boxers back on. He sat on the floor now, his back against the wall, and tried to collect himself. He blew his nose and dried his eyes and tried desperately to reason with himself. But the only thing he could think was that he was being a baby, at best, and likely disappointing Harry at the same time.

Harry’s mind was reeling too. He couldn’t wait outside any longer. He ran his fingers through his hair and twisted the rings on his fingers and tried to think of something, anything to say that would calm Louis’ nerves. 

“Please let me in, baby. Just let me in and we can talk,” he tried, gripping the door handle once again. 

Another wave of tears came to Louis as he listened to Harry’s desperate pleas on the other side of the door. Louis shook his head, knowing full well it didn’t matter because Harry couldn’t see him anyway. He felt so ashamed with himself, and wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball and disappear. 

“Louis, it’s just me. It’s just Harry,” Harry spoke gently from outside the door. He needed Louis to know that it was okay, whatever he wanted and whatever he was feeling was just fine. “Louis, whatever it is, whatever you’re feeling is okay. It’s okay to be nervous,” he spoke soothingly. “It’s okay to want this, but it’s also okay to say no, to decide against it.”

On the other side of the door, curled on the floor, Louis listened to Harry’s gentle voice. “I know,” Louis said softly, not sure if Harry would hear him or not. Louis balled his hands into fists. It was true, this was Harry. Him and Harry only, nobody else. Louis knew there was no reason he should be feeling so upset, but it was okay that he was. He took another deep breath. 

“Okay, you can come in,” Louis spoke quietly, almost too quiet for Harry to hear. But Harry did hear.

Harry slowly turned the door handle and opened the door. The sight of Louis on the floor curled up against the wall made Harry’s heart drop. He rushed over to Louis and sat himself down next to him.

“What is it babe? What’s wrong?” Harry asked as he wrapped both arms around Louis and pulled him close. 

“I don’t know it just felt wrong, it didn’t feel right,” Louis tried to explain even though his voice was breaking and his eyes were filling with tears once again.

“I’m sorry, Louis. I’m sorry it didn’t feel right. It’s okay though, it’s okay to be upset,” Harry cooed as Louis pressed his face into the front of Harry’s shoulder and let out a few muffled sobs.

Harry held Louis close and let him take his time to calm down. He looked around the bathroom at Louis’ clothes scattered here and there. He noticed the black panties on the floor and reasoned that Louis had likely tried them on at least. 

“What didn’t feel right about it, Lou?” Harry asked after a few minutes, after Louis had calmed a bit. Louis lifted his head and sniffled.

“I think… I think it was too rushed maybe?” he tried, fiddling with the hem of Harry’s shirt. Harry nodded.

“I was thinking that too. And that’s my fault,” Harry admitted, “I was so excited to see you, I rushed you too much.” Louis blushed a little.

“You were excited to see me?” he asked softly. Harry couldn’t help but smile.

“Of course, baby. I was so excited,” he confirmed, “But I think we need to talk about it more, maybe?”

“Yes, definitely,” Louis agreed. Harry nodded again, a gentle smile still on his face. “Also,” Louis spoke, softer now, “I didn’t like how you weren’t here, like… you were just waiting for me. But I want… I want you here with me,” Louis admitted, his face going red again.

“Oh I wanted to be here with you, too! I just wasn’t sure what you wanted,” Harry admitted with a laugh. Louis laughed with him this time.

“Okay we definitely should have talked about it more,” he said, feeling better already. Another thought came into his mind. “And I didn’t have time to… to paint my nails,” he admitted, looking down at his fingernails. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, baby. I thought about that,” Harry replied, his smile dropping away. “I can paint them for you, if you want. Like we did last time?” he offered.

“Okay, yeah. I liked that,” Louis said with a nod.

“And we had a bath last time, too.”

“I liked that a lot,” Louis said softly, still gazing at his fingernails, and recalling how lovely the bath with Harry had been. Louis had found it easy to relax in the warmth of the water, with the delicious smelling shampoo, and Harry holding him and whispering to him and touching him. And that reminded Louis of another thing. He turned his face into Harry’s shoulder again and curled his legs up against himself. “There was… there was something else, too,” he began. 

“Mm? What was it?” Harry asked, pulling Louis even closer.

“Well…” Louis tried. It was a difficult thing to put into words, and he wasn’t sure if he even knew exactly what he wanted. “I was thinking… when we took a bath last time I… I got hard pretty quick,” he said, feeling color come to his cheeks. Harry nodded.

“That’s okay, baby,” Harry said when Louis didn’t continue right away.

“But that might not happen this time,” Louis tried to explain. “But it might… it could happen, but I don’t know. I’m not sure how I’ll feel, I mean.”

“Okay,” Harry replied, trying to decipher exactly what Louis was trying to say through his anxieties.

“What I mean is, it’s not just about sex. Or like… it’s more than that I guess?” Louis was getting frustrated with himself now. 

“You told me you like to feel pretty. And that you want me to be gentle with you,” Harry offered. He thought he understood where Louis was trying to go. 

“Yeah. Yeah, exactly. That’s what it is. And it’s like, a combination of things. Like when I put the makeup on and paint my nails… and wear the lace now… I just want you to… to be soft and gentle with me,” Louis clarified. “And you can take control,” he added at the end.

“Be gentle with you and take control,” Harry repeated with a nod.

“Yes. I just want to… to feel like… safe and soft in your arms and… and not in control,” Louis finished. He realized it was the first time he had been able to really put his feelings into words, and it felt good. He liked being able to tell Harry exactly what he wanted. It felt like a release.

“I can definitely do that,” Harry said as he pressed his lips to the top of Louis’ head for a gentle kiss. He moved down to kiss Louis’ temple, and gently brushed his hair off his forehead. “I want you to feel safe and soft in my arms,” he whispered into Louis ear. Louis shivered at the feeling of Harry’s warm breath. 

Harry too felt a sense of relief and release. He knew it took a lot for Louis to be able to express himself like this, and to ask for what he needed.

“When we try again, whenever it is, we’ll take our time,” Harry said, still pressing kisses to Louis’ temple. “I’ll run us a nice bath, with pretty smelling bath salts… and I’ll paint your nails for you,” he said, kissing Louis between every few words. Louis closed his eyes and listened to Harry’s deep voice. 

“And we’ll be so warm and cozy in our bathrobes. And you can put on your makeup for me. You’ll look so pretty, Louis. And then we’ll get you into your pretty lace panties. They’ll look so good on you. You’ll look so sexy for me,” Harry nuzzled his nose against Louis’ cheek, making Louis giggle. “You’ll be so soft and sexy, baby. And I’ll hold you and kiss you; I’ll never want to let you go. I won’t be able to keep my hands off you.”

Louis thought he might start crying again, although this time it would be out of joy. This was exactly what he wanted. And it felt right. He giggled again as Harry’s eyelashes fluttered on his cheek while Harry kissed his jaw. 

“Harry?” Louis said softly as Harry kissed him.

“Mm?” Harry muttered through kisses.

“I love you,” Louis whispered. Harry smiled, his mouth against Louis’ cheekbone. 

“I love you too, Louis,” Harry replied as he held Louis tight. He finally felt the change. Things were clicking into place. The two of them fit together like perfectly cut puzzle pieces. 

…

 

Two days later was a Saturday, a day off, and Louis and Harry decided together that would be the day they would try it again. In the morning Harry painted Louis’ nails. He chose a dark purple to match one of the panties they had bought. 

They had dinner together that night; Harry made Louis his favorite meal. Then they watched television, snuggled on the couch together for a little while, Louis nestled into Harry’s side, Harry with his arm draped over Louis’ shoulders.

When the show was over, Harry switched off the television and squeezed Louis’ shoulder. “You ready for a bath, babe?” he asked soothingly.

“Yeah, I’m ready,” Louis replied as he sat up. He stretched his arms over his head and then stood up, Harry following. Harry placed a big hand on the small of Louis’ back and they walked together upstairs. 

They walked into the master bathroom and Harry went over to the tub and turned on the water. He added a generous amount of bath salts, plus bubble bath, and lit several candles around the edge of the tub.

Louis meanwhile opened his makeup drawer to choose what he wanted for later that night. But there were a lot of options now, and he still wasn’t good at combining different things yet. Harry always seemed to have a better grasp of that then Louis did. 

Louis looked over to Harry who had just finished lighting the candles. “Harry?” he asked softly.

“What is it, babe?” Harry asked, moving over to Louis now.

“Can you help me decide what to use later. You’re much better at it than me.”

“Of course, Lou,” Harry said with a smile. He peered into the drawer. “How about mascara plus eyeliner,” he asked, pulling out both things. “I like when your eyes are dark.” Louis nodded with a smile and arranged the two items on the counter for later use. “And this lip gloss. And your pretty blush,” Harry finished as he pulled out a raspberry-colored lip gloss and the same light pink blush they had been using. 

Louis looked at the items. He was happy with Harry’s selection; he always seemed to choose the right things. As Louis stood thinking about this, Harry wrapped his arms around Louis from behind. He pressed several kisses onto the top of Louis’ shoulder and the side of his neck, moving slowly and delicately. 

“You’re going to look so pretty for me, baby,” he whispered into Louis’ ear. Louis had been starting to feel anxious again, but Harry’s solid embrace calmed his nerves. 

Louis dropped his head and let Harry hold him for a few minutes. He listened to the sound of the bathtub filling with water, and inhaled the lovely scent of the bath salts and the candles. 

Harry rocked them gently side to side as he squeezed Louis, gentle but firm, and whispered into his ear and kissed his neck. Louis could feel his anxieties and desire for control begin to slip away. 

 

When the bath was ready, Harry guided Louis over to the tub and slowly took off their clothes, taking off his own shirt, and then Louis’, his own pants, and then Louis’ pants, and finally their briefs, until they were both fully naked. 

He held Louis’ hand as Louis stepped into the tub, and then stepped in and settled himself behind Louis. 

They took their time and moved slowly, knowing they had all night to themselves. Harry washed Louis’ hair and then they washed each others’ bodies. 

When they were done, Harry wrapped Louis in his big bathrobe, and put his own on as well. He helped Louis up onto the counter, his legs dangling off the side, so he could do Louis’ makeup.

Louis sat very still as Harry ran the eyeliner over his eyelids, and swept the mascara over his eyelashes. Harry applied the lip gloss and a hint of blush, kissing Louis’ now glossy-sleek lips after it was all applied.

Louis turned and looked at himself in the mirror and smiled. Harry did such a wonderful job every time, it made Louis almost want to cry.

“Can I have a little perfume, too?” Louis asked as he scooted himself off the counter.

“Of course, baby. Anything you want,” Harry replied, and grabbed Louis’ perfume. Louis held out his wrists and Harry sprayed a bit on each one. Louis rubbed his wrists together and then smelled them, smiling at the pretty flowery scent. 

“Okay, are you ready for the lace?” Harry asked tentatively, seeing that Louis seemed to be happy and doing well so far.

Even just the suggestion made Louis’ heart jump. He turned to look at the purple lace panties that were laid out on the top of the laundry hamper, ready for him. He walked over to them and ran his fingers across the delicate lace. It was now or never. Louis knew he wanted it. It was just a matter of getting past the initial stage of Harry first seeming him in them. 

“Yeah. Yeah I’m ready,” he said softly. Harry walked up behind him.

“There’s no shame in saying no. You know that, right? If you don’t want to, we don’t have to,” Harry said. He needed to make it clear to Louis one last time.

“No, I know. But I want to. I’m ready,” Louis said, more confidently now. Harry nodded and reached around Louis to grab the panties. 

“Do you want to keep your robe on for now, while you put them on?” he asked as he took Louis’ hand. 

“Yeah I think that’s a good idea,” Louis agreed as he allowed Harry to guide him back to the vanity in front of the mirror. 

“And I’ll help you into them. You just lean your bum against the counter,” Harry instructed.

Louis did as he was told, leaning back against the counter top. Harry gingerly untied the belt of Louis’ bathrobe and let it fall open, exposing his naked front. Louis was already blushing at the thought of what was coming. Harry had seen him naked hundreds of times, but this was different. Although he would actually have more fabric covering him, Louis thought it somehow felt more exposed.

Harry crouched down in front of Louis and guided his feet one by one into the panties. Once they were around his ankles, Harry very slowly pulled them up his legs. 

“Lean forward a bit, hold my shoulder for support,” Harry instructed as he pulled the panties up Louis’ thighs. As Louis leaned away from the counter, Harry pulled them the last of the way over his bum, standing as he did so. 

He didn’t look at Louis right away, but moved his body right up against Louis’ body and began to kiss his neck. Harry let his hands rest on Louis’ hips atop the lace. 

And Louis was grateful for that. He wiggled his hips a bit to get used to the feeling of the fabric stretched across his skin, and tried to lose himself again in Harry’s kisses.

“How does it feel?” Harry asked through kisses. He was growing hard just at the thought of Louis in these wonderful lace panties, even if he hadn’t yet taken in the full view. Louis wiggled his bum a bit, and pressed his body harder against Harry’s body.

“It feels… different. Feels good I think,” he said, smiling lightly as Harry pressed back.

“I’m getting hard just thinking about it,” Harry said, moving to kiss Louis’ lips now. “You’re so pretty, Louis. So wonderful and perfect and sexy,” he spoke through kisses. They moved their lips together, and Louis opened his mouth to Harry’s tongue. 

Louis was relieved to find himself growing hard as well, and it spurred him on. He wrapped his arms around Harry and pressed his hips against Harry’s hips. Harry moaned into Louis’ mouth as they moved together, and one hand found the knot of his bathrobe to pull it open.

After a moment Harry pulled his face back just a bit. “You ready to move to the bedroom, baby?” he asked. 

Louis bit his lip, and for the first time allowed himself to look down at his erection beginning to strain against the fabric of the panties. It was definitely something new to see and feel. He wasn’t fully hard yet, but somehow his dick looked bigger than usual, trapped in the delicate lace. 

Getting used to it now, Louis thought he actually quite liked the look of it. The dark purple color was perfect. It reminded him once again of his purple fingernails, and suddenly he wanted to see his hand on himself. 

Louis felt his face heat up just at the thought of it, and he found himself smiling coyly.

“What is it?” Harry asked, smiling back and pressing his nose into Louis’ nose. Louis noted that Harry hadn’t yet looked down at Louis, and he was incredibly grateful. It was as though Harry was waiting for permission. 

Louis bit his lip and wondered if he could say this next thing out loud. But, he figured, they had come this far. There was no point in modesty now. He swallowed hard and leaned his face into Harry’s neck. 

“I was wondering if I could… if I could… touch myself,” he asked quietly. 

Just those words had the blood rushing to Harry’s dick again and he practically felt his legs go weak. “God, Lou. Of course you can,” Harry breathed out. Louis giggled, hearing Harry so turned on. 

With the boost of encouragement, Louis dared to bring a hand back from around Harry’s back and press it between their bodies. He grabbed onto himself and stroked a few times, feeling and watching himself grow even harder in the panties. 

Meanwhile, Harry couldn’t keep his lips off Louis. He kissed all over his neck and jaw, moving a little quicker now, spurred on by the feeling of Louis’ hand between them and knowing what he was doing. 

Louis moved his hand a little faster too, although he didn’t want to come, he just wanted to get himself good and hard. 

“God, Lou, you’re so sexy. You make me so hot,” Harry muttered as he kissed Louis. 

After a minute or so, they were both well worked up. Louis’ hand was still on his dick, and Harry had his own crotch pressed against Louis’ thigh. He shrugged off his bathrobe, now standing fully naked.

“You ready for this to come off?” Harry asked, pulling just slightly away from Louis and nodding to the bathrobe Louis was still wearing. He was ready to see Louis and hoped Louis was ready as well. 

Louis moved his hand off himself. This was it now. Harry would see him and there would be no going back. He nodded, his heart beginning to race.

Harry gently grasped the shoulders of Louis’ robe, their hips still pressed together, and slid it off, allowing it to fall backwards and onto the floor. 

Harry took the opportunity to lean back just slightly, putting his hands once again on Louis’ hips, and looked down at Louis. 

Seeing Louis hard inside the panties was one of the hottest things Harry had ever seen, it practically made him dizzy. “Jesus,” he breathed, his eyes widening to take it all in. 

Louis giggled again but had to resist the urge to cover himself with his hands. “Okay, Harry, lets to the bedroom,” he said, pushing Harry playfully. 

“God, you’re so fucking sexy, Louis,” Harry said as he tore his eyes away from Louis’ dick to look up into his eyes. 

He grabbed Louis’ hand and walked them into the bedroom, more ready than ever to see the back view. Harry allowed Louis to move past him as they headed to the bed. He shamelessly stared as Louis’ bum as Louis walked.

“Are you ogling my bum?” Louis asked, trying to sound playful although his voice still had an uneasy tone.

“Yes,” Harry admitted shamelessly as he quickly walked right up behind Louis. “Kneel on the bed for me baby,” Harry instructed, wasting no time. 

 

Louis got up on his hands and knees in front of Harry on the mattress, Harry still standing. Harry immediately moved his hands and face to Louis’ bum, grabbing it and peppering it with kisses. Louis giggled again at Harry’s enthusiasm. 

His giggles quickly turned into a gasp though as Harry shamelessly buried his face in the crack of Louis’ ass, over the lace. 

“Jesus, Harry!” Louis cried out, not expecting Harry to move so quickly. Harry pulled back. 

“Okay, I just really wanted to do that,” Harry admitted. Louis laughed at the admission and allowed himself to fall to the side so he was sitting on the mattress now. 

Harry crawled onto the bed next to him. He laid a tender hand on Louis chest and began to rub up and down. He recalled Louis words. Slow and gentle. 

“Lay back for me, baby,” Harry instructed. Louis moved so his head was resting on the pillows and he was lying flat on his back. 

Harry moved on top of Louis and pressed their lips together. “I’m gonna make you feel so good,” he whispered through kisses. Louis blushed and began to squirm under Harry. “You’re so pretty. You look so pretty for me, baby. With your makeup and beautiful smelling perfume, and perfect panties,” Harry said as he let a hand wander to Louis’ crotch. “I want to give you everything you need.” 

Harry trailed kisses down Louis’ body, moving slowly over his chest and down his abdomen, all the way down to his dick, still straining against the lace.

Harry teased over Louis’ dick, mouthing over the lace, trailing kisses and little licks of his tongue. Louis began to squirm under him and grab at the sheets, already quite aroused.

“I want this to last, baby,” Harry mumbled through his kisses as he nuzzled into Louis’ crotch. “Why don’t we try a different position?” He looked up to Louis for confirmation, but Louis seemed already lost in his arousal. Harry felt butterflies in his stomach, seeing Louis so overwhelmed, and knowing he had helped with that. Harry recalled Louis’ words: he wanted Harry to take control.

“I’m gonna flip around. Wanna rim you while you suck my dick,” Harry explained as he shifted his body, crawling up the mattress and then lying backwards on it so his hips were up by Louis’ head. “C’mere babe,” Harry said as he pulled Louis’ body into him, them lying on their sides now in opposite directions, and grabbed Louis’ top leg. He guided Louis’ leg, knee bent, until it was hooked behind Harry’s back.

In this position Harry had great access to Louis’ bum. Louis had his mouth and a hand on Harry’s dick and was beginning to suck him off. 

It was unbelievably arousing and intimate at the same time. Harry held the panties aside with one hand and teased Louis’ hole with his tongue over and over while Louis shuddered and tried to keep a rhythm with Harry’s cock. 

Soon their moans filled the room and Harry too was overwhelmed with arousal. He kept his tongue relentless on Louis’ rim, licking the flat of it across the top, and then pushing it inside to open Louis up. 

“Oh, God, Harry,” Louis moaned when Harry added two fingers on each side of his tongue. 

“Are you gonna come soon, baby?” Harry asked through his licks. He felt Louis nod and so he moved away. He had every intention of fucking Louis tonight with more than just his tongue. 

“Want me to fuck you now?” Harry asked breathlessly as he turned around again to bring them face to face.

“Yeah, yeah,” Louis managed to say through his panting. He took the opportunity to look down his body at his cock, still snug inside the panties, but now leaking precome and creating a wet spot on the front of the lace. Color came to his cheeks as he realized how good it felt, his cock trapped in the pretty undergarment that was meant for women but that somehow felt unbelievably amazing on him. “Feels good,” he found himself mumbling as Harry crawled on top of him, rubbing their hips together.

“Yeah?” Harry asked, “Do you want to keep the panties on while I fuck you?” Harry asked. He began to kiss Louis once again, trailing his lips across Louis’ jaw. 

“Yeah, can I keep them on?” Louis asked softly as he pressed his neck into Harry’s kisses.

“Of course, baby. They look so pretty on you. I was hoping you’d say yes,” Harry replied, realizing that was what Louis needed. 

Harry let his hands wander, rubbing over Louis’ pecks and over his tummy and down to the lace. He ground their hips together again as his lips met Louis’ lips. Louis wrapped his arms around Harry and pulled him deeper into the kiss. 

With the tender kisses and loving touches, Louis was at ease, and his legs parted easily when Harry slipped his hand between Louis’ thighs.

“You ready for me, baby?” Harry whispered into Louis’ ear, moving his hand upward and between Louis’ bum cheeks and allowing his fingers to graze his rim once again. 

“I’m ready,” Louis said as he turned his face to nuzzle against Harry’s neck. 

Harry positioned himself, the tip of his cock at Louis’ entrance, and pushed slowly in. Louis gasped into his neck and held on tighter as Harry pushed all the way in. 

Harry held himself still for a moment, deep inside Louis, and let their breathing fall back into a steady pattern. Only when he knew Louis was ready did Harry begin to slowly thrust. 

Keeping their lips attached the entire time, Harry slowly thrust in and out of Louis, going deep but never too fast or rough. He knew Louis wanted to feel delicate, and that he wanted Harry to be gentle, so Harry was. He kissed Louis deeply, pushing his tongue into Louis’ mouth and moving their bodies together.

When Harry noticed tears in Louis’ eyes, he knew it was from the overwhelming intensity of their lovemaking, and not from pain or sadness or fear.

“I love you, Louis,” Harry whispered into Louis’ ear, and continued to say it over and over again until they were both just on the edge of orgasm. 

When they came it was at the same time, Harry inside Louis and Louis into the panties. Harry held himself still, holding onto Louis, Louis holding onto him. 

Harry gingerly rolled off Louis after a moment and moved to his side, pressed against Louis’ side. Harry kept an arm wrapped over Louis’ chest, and a leg draped across Louis’ legs. He whispered soothing words of praise against Louis’ ear and kissed his neck. 

Harry could tell Louis was in a docile place, not speaking but just listening and feeling. He had tear tracks on his cheeks and down his temples. It was a quiet calm for both of them. 

Harry rubbed Louis’ tummy and reached down to cover them with the blankets. “Do you need water, baby? Or anything?” Harry asked, pressing soft kisses to Louis’ collarbones now.

“Should I… should I take them off?” Louis spoke, so softly Harry almost didn’t hear. It took Harry a moment to realize what Louis was referring to. 

Harry carefully lifted the covers and peeked underneath. The panties were wet with sweat and semen. They could certainly use a night of soaking. 

“They should probably be washed. If we want to keep them, that is,” Harry replied softly, moving his hand to rub across Louis’ belly again. 

Louis didn’t move to take them off, but started to squirm slightly. 

“I’ll help you,” Harry said, pushing the covers back and sitting up to kneel next to Louis. He grasped the panties at Louis’ hips and very gently pulled them down Louis’ legs. He kissed along Louis’ torso and then down each thigh as he slid the panties down, taking his time to go slowly and gently.

“I love you so much, baby. You’re perfect,” Harry admired as he kissed Louis’ thighs. Louis turned red again at the praise, but let Harry continue. Harry pushed the panties down to Louis’ ankles and pushed Louis’ legs open slightly, kissing his inner thighs. “I love you. And I love you in your pretty panties,” he whispered through kisses.

 

Finally Harry sat up and pulled the panties all the way off Louis. Harry got off the bed and went into the bathroom to place the panties in the sink, filling it with water. He didn’t take the time to clean them; just let them sit to soak overnight. He wanted to return to Louis as quick as possible. 

When Harry got back to the bed Louis was sitting up, his knees curled to his chest. “We’ll leave them overnight,” Harry said as he got in bed next to Louis and wrapped an arm across his shoulders. 

They sat in silence for a moment, each lost in his own thoughts. Harry could tell Louis in his head again, but let him stay there for the time being. 

When Louis finally spoke, his voice sounded strangled and high pitch. But it was what he said that made Harry’s heart break.

“I’m sorry,” Louis admitted softly, not looking at Harry but straight ahead at the opposite wall. Harry was taken aback by the apology.

“Sorry? What on earth are you sorry for?” he asked seriously, his brow scrunched in confusion. Louis took a deep, halted breath.

“For liking weird things like this. For not being more… normal,” Louis said as he dropped his gaze to his purple fingernails. 

“No, no, no. You’re not going to do that. No. None of that,” Harry spoke assertively, squeezing Louis’ shoulder. “I like it too. I’m not normal either. There is no normal. Don’t ever apologize for liking what you like.” Louis nodded, still holding his legs, but allowing himself to lean slightly against Harry now.

“I love you so much, Louis. And I love that we love the same things. You’re so perfect and so sexy…” Harry continued, kissing Louis now. “So pretty. You’re so pretty, baby. My pretty Louis,” he praised between kisses. He ran a hand up and down Louis’ leg, the other hand still firmly grasping Louis’ shoulder.

“Do you understand me?” Harry asked, softer now, when Louis didn’t reply. Louis nodded again, but looked at Harry now.

“Yes,” he replied. Harry knew it wouldn’t be that easy. But perhaps given some time, Louis would begin to see that this was not so strange, and he would see how much Harry wanted this as well.

“Is there anything you need? Anything you want?” Harry asked, and leaned his chin on Louis’ shoulder.

“Just you,” Louis replied. Harry leaned back and pulled Louis with him, lying them down once again. He reached down for the bedcovers to cover them up. 

“Well, you definitely have me.”

….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!


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